How to Treat Others - Living Faithfully, Loving Boldly - 14 Sessions
This study is designed to help us refocus on what it means to treat others with kindness, dignity, and Christ-like love. In a world that often feels hurried and harsh, we are called to be gentle lights—living examples of God’s enduring goodness.
Session 1: Love Others Deeply and Sincerely - Mark 12:31, Matthew 5:44, 1 Peter 4:8, Romans 12:9
Session 3: Serve and Honor Others - John 13:14, Romans 12:10, Galatians 5:13, Philippians 2:3
Session 5: Be Just and Fair - Deuteronomy 16:19, Isaiah 1:17, Luke 6:31, Deuteronomy 24:17
Session 6: Forgive Freely and Graciously - Luke 6:37, Ephesians 4:32, Proverbs 17:9, Matthew 6:14
Session 7: Promote Peace and Unity - Matthew 5:9, Romans 12:18, 1 Peter 3:11, Ephesians 4:3
Session 11: Be Generous and Share - Luke 6:30, Romans 12:13, Hebrews 13:16, 2 Corinthians 9:7
Session 12: Be Humble and Considerate - Ephesians 5:21, Proverbs 3:7, Philippians 4:5, 1 Peter 5:5
Session 14: Our Living Legacy - Why This Study Matters - Matthew 5:16
Biblical Teachings on How to Treat Others
A Study Guide for Living as Examples of Christ's Love
Introduction:
"In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father." (Matthew 5:16, NLT)
We Are the Living Legacy
We are the living legacy of faith—and our words and actions shape the next generation. After decades of walking with Christ, we've learned that faith isn't just something we profess on Sundays; it's something we live out daily in how we treat our spouse, our neighbor, the grocery store clerk, and yes, especially our grandchildren.
Our grandchildren are watching—not just what we say, but how we treat others. They notice when we're patient with a slow waiter or when we speak kindly about someone who has hurt us. They observe how we respond when someone cuts us off in traffic or when we disagree with a family member. These moments, perhaps more than our words, teach them what it truly means to follow Jesus.
What we model in love, humility, and kindness becomes the seeds our grandchildren will sow. The grace we show today will echo in their hearts tomorrow. The patience we demonstrate will become part of their character. The forgiveness we practice will shape how they handle their own relationships.
Our Calling as Mentors
The Bible gives us timeless wisdom—not just for our own walk, but for guiding those who follow. Scripture doesn't just tell us to love God; it shows us specifically how to love others. These aren't merely nice suggestions—they're the very characteristics that mark us as Christ's disciples.
In a world of shifting values, we can be steady compasses pointing to Christ. While culture changes rapidly around us, God's Word remains constant. Our grandchildren need to see what unchanging love looks like lived out in real life, in everyday moments, in ordinary interactions.
We're not just finishing our race—we're paving the way for theirs. The apostle Paul reminds us in 1 Corinthians 4:16 to "imitate me as I imitate Christ." As seasoned believers, we have the privilege and responsibility of being that example for the generation coming behind us.
The Heart of This Study
Let's explore how Scripture teaches us to treat others—so we can live it, teach it, and leave it behind as a gift. Over these thirteen sessions, we'll dive deep into God's Word to discover not just what Christ-like love looks like, but how to practice it in our daily lives.
This isn't about perfection—none of us have arrived. It's about growth, about becoming more like Jesus in how we interact with everyone around us. It's about leaving a legacy of love that our grandchildren will remember long after we're gone.
Each week, we'll examine biblical principles that can transform our relationships and our witness. We'll discuss practical ways to apply these truths, share our experiences, and encourage one another in this vital calling.
May God use this time together to deepen our love for Him and for others, and may our lives become living testimonies of His grace—examples that point our loved ones directly to the heart of our Savior.
"Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God." (1 John 4:7, NLT)
Session
1: Love Others Deeply and Sincerely-
Mark
12:31, Matthew 5:44, 1 Peter 4:8, Romans 12:9
Study Notes — Handout — Audio
Key Idea: Real love comes from the heart and shows in our actions.
Scripture:
"Love your neighbor as yourself" (Mark 12:31)
"Love your enemies and pray for those who hurt you" (Matthew 5:44)
"Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers many sins" (1 Peter 4:8)
"Don't just pretend to love others. Really love them" (Romans 12:9)
What to Look For
As you study these verses, watch for three things. First, notice how love is described as something we do, not just something we feel. Second, see how God calls us to love even difficult people. Third, look for the difference between fake love and real love that comes from the heart.
Personal Reflection Questions
The Mirror Test: If you could see yourself through your grandchildren's eyes this week, what would they say love looks like in your daily life?
The Difficult Person: Think of someone who rubs you the wrong way. What would it look like to pray for them instead of complaining about them?
Overview
In our world today, love has become a feeling more than an action. We say "I love pizza" and "I love my spouse" with the same word. Social media tells us to "love ourselves first" and movies teach us that love is just a warm emotion. But the Bible presents love differently. Biblical love is a choice we make every day. It's something we do for others, especially when they don't deserve it. This kind of love stands out in our culture because it's rare and powerful.
This May Surprise You
Here's something that might surprise you about loving your enemies. Jesus isn't asking you to have warm, fuzzy feelings about people who hurt you. The Greek word for love here is "agape," which means to seek someone's highest good regardless of how you feel about them. You can love your enemies by praying for their welfare and treating them with respect, even while you protect yourself from their harmful behavior. Love doesn't mean being a doormat.
Seeds for Thought
Point 1: "Love your neighbor as yourself" (Mark 12:31) Comment: This assumes we already care about our own needs and comfort. Jesus says to extend that same care to others. When we're hungry, we feed ourselves. When others are hungry, we should want to feed them too.
Point 2: "Love your enemies and pray for those who hurt you" (Matthew 5:44) Comment: This is the hardest kind of love because it goes against our natural feelings. But praying for difficult people often changes our hearts toward them, and it always changes us for the better.
Point 3: "Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers many sins" (1 Peter 4:8) Comment: Deep love means we choose to overlook small offenses and forgive bigger ones. It doesn't mean we ignore serious problems, but we don't keep a record of every little wrong.
Point 4: "Don't just pretend to love others. Really love them" (Romans 12:9) Comment: Fake love says the right words but doesn't follow through with actions. Real love might be quiet, but it shows up when people need help, comfort, or encouragement.
Take-Home Thought
God's plan for love is bigger than just making us feel good. When we love others the way He loves us, we become living proof that God is real and good. This kind of love draws people to Jesus because they can see something different in us. It's not natural to love difficult people or to serve others when we're tired. When we do these things anyway, people notice. They start asking questions about what makes us different. That's when we get to tell them about Jesus. Our love becomes a bridge that connects others to God's love. This is why Jesus said people would know we are His followers by how we love each other. Love isn't just a nice idea—it's our most powerful witness to the world around us.
Quotes
Charles Spurgeon: "Have you no wish for others to be saved? Then you're not saved yourself, be sure of that!"
Corrie ten Boom: "Forgiveness is not an emotion. Forgiveness is an act of the will, and the will can function regardless of the temperature of the heart."
Similar Scripture
1 Peter 4:8 “Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins.”
Romans 12:10 “Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other.”
Ephesians 4:2 “Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love.”
Colossians 3:14 “Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony.”
1 John 4:19 “We love each other because he loved us first.”
John 15:12 “This is my commandment: Love each other in the same way I have loved you.”
Hebrews 13:1 “Keep on loving each other as brothers and sisters.”
James 3:17 “But the wisdom from above is first of all pure. It is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and the fruit of good deeds. It shows no favoritism and is always sincere.”
Biblical Connection
The command to "love your neighbor as yourself" appears multiple times in Scripture, showing its importance:
Originally given in Leviticus 19:18 as part of God's law for His people
Repeated by Jesus in Matthew 22:39 as the second greatest commandment
Echoed by Paul in Romans 13:9 and Galatians 5:14
Referenced by James in James 2:8 as the "royal law"
The concept of loving enemies connects to:
Jesus' teaching in the Sermon on the Mount (Matthew 5:44)
His example of forgiving those who crucified Him (Luke 23:34)
Stephen's prayer for those who stoned him (Acts 7:60)
How Does This Help Me Trust God Today?
When we choose to love others, especially difficult people, we're trusting that God's way works better than our natural way. Our natural way is to love only those who love us back. But God asks us to love everyone, trusting that He will bless our obedience. This builds our faith because we see how love often softens hard hearts and opens doors we never expected. Even when people don't respond well to our love, we can trust that God sees our obedience and will use it for good in ways we might never know.
Legacy Lens
How to Model This: Let your grandchildren or other people in general see you speaking kindly about people who have hurt you. When someone cuts you off in traffic, let them hear you say, "I hope they get where they're going safely." When a family member disappoints you, show them how you continue to treat that person with respect and kindness.
Teaching Example: "You know, your great-aunt and I had some hard times years ago, but I've learned that holding grudges only hurts me. I pray for her happiness, and when I see her at family gatherings, I make sure to be kind. That's what Jesus would do."
Action Toolbox
Story to Share: Tell about a time when someone showed unexpected kindness to you, and how it made you feel. Then ask, "Who could we surprise with kindness this week?"
Simple Activity: Keep a small notebook and write down one way you showed love each day for a week. Share your list with a grandchild or younger family member, and ask them to try the same thing.
Conversation Starter: "I've been thinking about how Jesus loves people. What do you think love looks like when someone makes you really mad?"
Changed Life
This teaching about sincere love can change the way we handle everyday irritations and disappointments. Instead of letting small offenses pile up into resentment, we learn to let them go. When someone cuts us off in traffic or a family member forgets to call, we can choose to respond with grace rather than anger.
The real change happens in our hearts. We stop keeping score of who did what and who owes us an apology. We begin to see difficult people—maybe that grumpy neighbor or the relative who always criticizes—as someone who needs love, not our judgment. This doesn't mean we become doormats. It means we stop letting other people's behavior control our peace of mind. We act out of our values, not just react to what others do.
Suggestions
Here are two practical ways to live this out:
Start with prayer for one difficult person. Pick someone who rubs you the wrong way—maybe someone at church, a family member, or even someone you see on the news. Pray for them by name each day for a week. Not a prayer that they'll change, but a simple prayer for their wellbeing. You might be surprised how praying for someone softens your heart toward them.
Do one unexpected kindness each week. Bake cookies for a neighbor you barely know. Send a card to someone who's been on your mind. Call that friend everyone else has given up on. These small acts train our hearts to think about others first. And here's the thing—it doesn't have to be big or expensive. Sometimes the smallest gestures mean the most.
Into Action
Think about someone in your life who needs to feel loved this week. Not someone who's easy to love, but someone who might be difficult or lonely. Maybe it's the widow down the street who complains a lot, or the person at church who sits alone, or even that family member who drives you crazy at every gathering.
This week, reach out to that person in one specific way. Make a phone call, write a note, or invite them for coffee. Don't wait for them to reach out first. Don't worry about whether they deserve it. Just love them the way Jesus loved people—before they earned it, before they cleaned up their act.
A real person who lives this way: Consider Fred Rogers from Mister Rogers' Neighborhood. He wasn't just acting for the cameras. His friends and neighbors said he was the same person off-screen—patient, kind, genuinely interested in everyone he met. He treated the janitor with the same respect as a famous guest. He answered every letter from children, sometimes thousands a year. He once said, "Love is at the root of everything—all learning, all parenting, all relationships. Love or the lack of it." Fred Rogers showed us that sincere love isn't flashy. It's steady, patient, and shows up even when no one's watching.
Prayer Focus
"Lord Jesus, You showed us what real love looks like when You died for us while we were still sinners. Help me to love others the way You love me—not because they deserve it, but because You call me to it. Give me strength to pray for people who hurt me, and wisdom to show kindness to those who are hard to love. Help my family see You in the way I treat others. Make my love real, not fake. In Your precious name, Amen."
Session
2: Show Kindness, Mercy, and Compassion
Ephesians
4:32, Micah 6:8, Matthew 5:7, Proverbs 19:17
Study Notes — Handout — Audio
Key Idea: God wants us to be gentle and caring toward others.
Scripture:
"Be kind and compassionate to one another" (Ephesians 4:32)
"The Lord has told you what is good, and this is what he requires of you: to do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God" (Micah 6:8)
"God blesses those who are merciful, for they will be shown mercy" (Matthew 5:7)
"If you help the poor, you are lending to the Lord" (Proverbs 19:17)
What to Look For
As you study these verses, notice three things. First, see how kindness and compassion are commands, not suggestions. Second, look for how mercy means giving people what they need instead of what they deserve. Third, watch for how God promises to bless those who show mercy to others.
Personal Reflection Questions
The Grocery Store Test: When you're at the store and someone takes forever counting change or can't find their keys, what does your face show? What would kindness look like in that moment?
The Memory Lane Question: Think of the most compassionate person you've ever known. What did they do that made such an impression on you?
Overview
Our culture often sees kindness as weakness and mercy as being soft. We hear phrases like "nice guys finish last" and "you have to look out for yourself." People are quick to demand their rights and slow to extend grace. Road rage, online arguments, and impatient customers have become normal. But God calls His people to be different. In a world that's often harsh and demanding, Christians who show genuine kindness and mercy stand out like lights in the darkness. This gentleness isn't weakness—it's strength under control.
This May Surprise You
Here's something that might surprise you about mercy. The word "mercy" in the Bible doesn't just mean feeling sorry for someone. It means taking action to help when someone is in trouble, even if their trouble is their own fault. When the Good Samaritan helped the beaten man, he didn't ask if the man deserved it. He just helped. Mercy sees a need and responds with kindness, regardless of whether the person "earned" it.
Seeds for Thought
Point 1: "Be kind and compassionate to one another" (Ephesians 4:32) Comment: Paul wrote this to people who lived in the same church and saw each other regularly. Even in church, people can be unkind. Kindness is something we must choose on purpose, especially with people we see often.
Point 2: "To do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God" (Micah 6:8) Comment: This verse shows God's priorities: justice, mercy, and humility. Notice mercy isn't just something we do—we're supposed to love doing it. When showing mercy becomes a joy, not a burden, we're growing in godliness.
Point 3: "God blesses those who are merciful, for they will be shown mercy" (Matthew 5:7) Comment: This isn't a business deal with God. It's a spiritual principle. When we practice mercy, our hearts become more tender, and we receive mercy from God and often from others too.
Point 4: "If you help the poor, you are lending to the Lord" (Proverbs 19:17) Comment: God takes our kindness to needy people personally. When we help someone who can't pay us back, God considers it a loan to Him. That's how much He cares about the vulnerable.
Take-Home Thought
God's heart is full of compassion, and He wants us to reflect that same heart to the world. When we show kindness to difficult people, mercy to those who've made mistakes, and compassion to those who are hurting, we're acting like our heavenly Father. This isn't just about being nice—it's about showing the world what God is like. Every act of kindness is a small sermon about God's character. Every moment of mercy reflects how God treats us. When our grandchildren see us being patient with a slow cashier or helpful to a struggling neighbor, they're learning what it means to live like Jesus. Over time, these small acts of compassion shape not only the people we help but also our own hearts and the hearts of those who watch us.
Quotes
John Wesley: "Do all the good you can, by all the means you can, in all the ways you can, in all the places you can, at all the times you can, to all the people you can, as long as ever you can."
Mother Teresa: "Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless."
Similar Scripture
Galatians 6:10 “So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up. Therefore, whenever we have the opportunity, we should do good to everyone—especially to those in the family of faith.”
Colossians 3:12 “Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.”
Zechariah 7:9 “This is what the Lord of Heaven’s Armies says: Judge fairly, and show mercy and kindness to one another. Do not oppress widows, orphans, foreigners, and the poor.”
Luke 6:35 “Love your enemies! Do good to them. Lend to them without expecting to be repaid. Then your reward from heaven will be very great, and you will truly be acting as children of the Most High, for he is kind to those who are unthankful and wicked.”
Psalm 145:17 “The Lord is righteous in everything he does; he is filled with kindness.”
Joel 2:13 “Don’t tear your clothing in your grief, but tear your hearts instead. Return to the Lord your God, for he is merciful and compassionate, slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love. He is eager to relent and not punish.”
1 Peter 3:8 “Finally, all of you should be of one mind. Sympathize with each other. Love each other as brothers and sisters. Be tenderhearted, and keep a humble attitude.”
Proverbs 3:3–4 “Never let loyalty and kindness leave you! Tie them around your neck as a reminder. Write them deep within your heart. Then you will find favor with both God and people, and you will earn a good reputation.”
Biblical Connection
The theme of showing mercy appears throughout Scripture:
God's mercy described in Exodus 34:6-7 as part of His character
The parable of the unmerciful servant in Matthew 18:21-35
Jesus' compassion for crowds in Matthew 9:36 and Mark 6:34
The Good Samaritan's mercy in Luke 10:25-37
The call to care for the poor echoes throughout the Bible:
Deuteronomy 15:11 - "There will always be poor people in the land"
Isaiah 58:6-7 - True fasting includes helping the needy
Matthew 25:35-40 - Caring for others is caring for Jesus
James 1:27 - Pure religion includes caring for orphans and widows
How Does This Help Me Trust God Today?
When we choose to be kind and merciful, we're trusting that God's way of treating people is better than the world's way. The world says "get them before they get you," but God says "treat others as you want to be treated." When we show mercy to someone who doesn't deserve it, we're trusting that God sees our kindness and will take care of us. This builds our faith because we learn that being good to others doesn't make us weaker—it makes God stronger in our lives.
Legacy Lens
How to Model This: Let your grandchildren see you being patient with service workers, generous with your time for neighbors, and quick to help when someone has a need. Don't make a big show of it—just let your natural compassion shine through.
Teaching Example: "I remember when Mrs. Johnson next door broke her hip. Your grandpa and I took her meals for weeks. We didn't do it to get anything back—we did it because that's what neighbors do. That's what Jesus would do."
Action Toolbox
Story to Share: Tell about a time when someone showed you unexpected kindness during a difficult period in your life. Explain how their compassion made a difference not just in your circumstances but in your heart.
Simple Activity: Keep a "kindness jar" for a week. Each time you do something kind for someone, write it on a slip of paper and put it in the jar. At the end of the week, read them all and see how many opportunities for kindness God gave you.
Conversation Starter: "I've been thinking about how good it feels when someone is kind to me. What's the nicest thing someone has done for you lately?"
Changed Life
This teaching changes how we see people who are struggling. Instead of judging why someone is in a tough spot, we start asking how we can help. We stop thinking "they should have made better choices" and start thinking "what do they need right now?"
This shift in thinking is powerful. When we see someone who's lost their job, going through a divorce, or battling addiction, our first response becomes compassion instead of criticism. We remember that we've all needed mercy at some point. We've all made mistakes. We've all had seasons where we couldn't make it without help from others.
The gospel reminds us that God showed us mercy when we didn't deserve it. That changes everything. Now when we meet someone who's hurting, we don't ask "do they deserve my help?" We ask "how can I show them the same kindness God showed me?" It makes us softer, more patient, quicker to give people the benefit of the doubt.
Suggestions
Here are two ways to practice this:
Keep mercy money in your wallet. Set aside twenty or thirty dollars that's just for helping others. When you see someone in need—whether it's the person with a sign at the intersection, someone short on cash at the grocery store, or a friend struggling with bills—you're ready to help right then. Don't worry about whether they'll use it wisely. That's between them and God. Your job is just to be kind.
Listen without trying to fix. When someone shares a problem, resist the urge to immediately offer advice or tell them what they should do. Just listen. Say things like "that sounds really hard" or "I'm sorry you're going through this." Sometimes the most merciful thing we can do is make someone feel heard and understood. Then, if it feels right, ask "is there anything I can do to help?"
Into Action
This week, look for one person who needs mercy or compassion. It might be someone at church going through a health crisis, a family member facing financial trouble, or someone in your community dealing with loss. Don't wait for them to ask for help—people often won't.
Reach out with something concrete. Bring a meal. Offer a ride to an appointment. Help with yard work. Send a gift card for groceries. Write a check. The key is to do something specific and practical, not just say "let me know if you need anything."
A real person who lives this way: Think about Dolly Parton. She grew up poor in the mountains of Tennessee and never forgot what that felt like. She's given away millions to help children get books, to support families after wildfires, and to help develop the COVID vaccine. But she doesn't just write checks from far away. She stays connected to her hometown and helps her neighbors personally. When asked why she gives so much, she said "If you have the means, you have the responsibility." She shows us that compassion isn't just feeling bad for people—it's doing something about it. And you don't have to be rich like Dolly to make a difference. You just have to care enough to act.
Prayer Focus
"Heavenly Father, You have shown us incredible mercy and kindness, even when we didn't deserve it. Help me to pass that same mercy along to others. When I see someone struggling, give me compassion instead of judgment. When someone is slow or difficult, give me patience instead of irritation. Help me see people the way You see them—as precious children who need love and care. Let my kindness be a reflection of Your heart. Use my small acts of mercy to show others how much You care about them. In Jesus' name, Amen."
Session
3: Serve and Honor Others
John
13:14, Romans 12:10, Galatians 5:13, Philippians 2:3
Study Notes — Handout — Audio
Key Idea: Jesus came to serve, not to be served. We should follow His example.
Scripture:
"Since I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you ought to wash each other's feet" (John 13:14)
"Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other" (Romans 12:10)
"Use your freedom to serve one another in love" (Galatians 5:13)
"Don't be selfish... be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves" (Philippians 2:3)
What to Look For
As you study these verses, watch for three things. First, notice how Jesus set the example of serving others, even doing jobs that servants usually did. Second, see how serving others is connected to genuine love and humility. Third, look for how honoring others means putting their needs and feelings ahead of our own comfort.
Personal Reflection Questions
The Restaurant Test: When you're eating out and the server makes a mistake, do you treat them like they're beneath you or like they're doing important work? What would "honoring" them look like?
The Family Gathering Question: At family events, are you the one who offers to help in the kitchen or the one who expects to be waited on? What sends a stronger message about Jesus?
Overview
Our culture promotes self-service and personal rights. We have self-checkout lanes, self-serve everything, and endless messages about "you deserve this" and "treat yourself." Social media encourages us to promote ourselves and seek followers. The idea of serving others, especially people we don't know well, seems old-fashioned. But Jesus turned this thinking upside down. He said the greatest people are those who serve others. In a world where everyone wants to be important, Christians who genuinely serve and honor others show a completely different way of living that catches people's attention.
This May Surprise You
Here's something that might surprise you about foot washing. In Jesus' time, washing feet wasn't just being nice—it was the job of the lowest servant in the household. Roads were dusty and dirty, people wore sandals, and feet got filthy. Jesus, the Son of God, got down on His knees and did the job that even regular servants tried to avoid. He wasn't just being helpful—He was showing that no act of service is beneath us if it helps someone else. The shocking part wasn't the washing—it was who was doing it.
Seeds for Thought
Point 1: "Since I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you ought to wash each other's feet" (John 13:14) Comment: Jesus wasn't starting a foot-washing ceremony. He was saying if the Master can do humble work, then surely His followers can too. The question isn't whether we're too important to help—it's whether we're humble enough to serve.
Point 2: "Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other" (Romans 12:10) Comment: Paul says we should "take delight" in honoring others. This means finding joy in making others feel valued and important. It's not just doing nice things—it's enjoying the chance to lift others up.
Point 3: "Use your freedom to serve one another in love" (Galatians 5:13) Comment: Freedom in Christ doesn't mean we get to do whatever we want. It means we're free from having to impress people, so we can focus on serving them instead. True freedom leads to service, not selfishness.
Point 4: "Don't be selfish... be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves" (Philippians 2:3) Comment: This doesn't mean thinking we're worthless. It means when we're making decisions, we consider how our choices affect others. We ask "How can I help?" instead of "What's in it for me?"
Take-Home Thought
When Jesus washed the disciples' feet, He was teaching them something revolutionary about leadership and greatness. In God's kingdom, the way up is down. The way to be great is to serve others. This isn't just a nice idea—it's how God designed relationships to work best. When we serve others and honor them, we create an atmosphere where everyone feels valued and loved. This is especially powerful in families. When grandparents serve their children and grandchildren—not by spoiling them, but by showing them how to put others first—they're passing down one of the most important lessons in life. Service isn't about being weak or letting people walk all over us. It's about being strong enough to put someone else's needs ahead of our own comfort. When our families see us living this way, they learn that true strength comes from lifting others up, not putting them down.
Quotes
Billy Graham: "A coach will impact more people in one year than the average person will in an entire lifetime."
Rick Warren: "Service is the pathway to real significance."
Similar Scripture
Matthew 20:28 “For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many.”
Mark 9:35 “He sat down, called the twelve disciples over to him, and said, ‘Whoever wants to be first must take last place and be the servant of everyone else.’”
John 12:26 “Anyone who wants to serve me must follow me, because my servants must be where I am. And the Father will honor anyone who serves me.”
1 Peter 4:10 “God has given each of you a gift from his great variety of spiritual gifts. Use them well to serve one another.”
Hebrews 6:10 “For God is not unjust. He will not forget how hard you have worked for him and how you have shown your love to him by caring for other believers, as you still do.”
Colossians 3:23–24 “Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people. Remember that the Lord will give you an inheritance as your reward, and that the Master you are serving is Christ.”
Mark 10:45 “For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many.”
1 Corinthians 15:58 “So, my dear brothers and sisters, be strong and immovable. Always work enthusiastically for the Lord, for you know that nothing you do for the Lord is ever useless.”
Biblical Connection
The theme of servant leadership runs throughout Scripture:
Moses serving as God's representative to lead Israel (Exodus 3-4)
David starting as a shepherd boy who served his father (1 Samuel 17:15)
Jesus saying "whoever wants to be first must be the very last" (Mark 9:35)
Paul describing himself as a servant of Christ (Romans 1:1)
The concept of honoring others appears in many places:
"Honor your father and mother" (Exodus 20:12)
"Outdo one another in showing honor" (Romans 12:10 ESV)
"Honor everyone" (1 Peter 2:17)
Jesus honoring children when others dismissed them (Mark 10:13-16)
The connection between greatness and service:
"Whoever wants to be great must be your servant" (Matthew 20:26)
Jesus serving at the Last Supper (Luke 22:27)
Paul's example of working with his hands (Acts 20:34-35)
How Does This Help Me Trust God Today?
When we choose to serve others instead of demanding to be served, we're trusting that God sees our heart and will take care of our needs. The world tells us to look out for ourselves first, but God says when we serve others, He will honor us. This builds our faith because we learn that putting others first doesn't leave us empty—it fills us with purpose and joy. We discover that serving others is actually one of the most satisfying things we can do, because that's how God made us to live.
Legacy Lens
How to Model This: Let your grandchildren see you serving others without being asked and without expecting thanks. Help carry groceries for an elderly neighbor, volunteer to clean up after church events, or offer to help when someone is moving. Show them that service is a privilege, not a burden.
Teaching Example: "You know, when I was younger, I thought important people got served by others. But I've learned that the most important thing I can do is serve other people. That's what Jesus did, and that's what makes life meaningful."
Action Toolbox
Story to Share: Tell about someone who served you when you really needed help, and how their willingness to serve made you feel loved and valued. Then talk about how good it feels when you get to help someone else.
Simple Activity: For one week, look for one small way to serve someone each day—hold a door, carry something heavy, let someone go ahead of you in line. Keep track of how these small acts of service affect your own mood and attitude.
Conversation Starter: "I've been thinking about how Jesus washed His disciples' feet. If you were going to 'wash someone's feet' today, what would that look like?"
Changed Life
This teaching flips our thinking upside down. We live in a world that says "look out for number one" and "you deserve to be treated like royalty." But Jesus says the path to real joy is found in serving others, not in being served.
When we take this to heart, it changes our daily frustrations. We stop feeling annoyed when someone needs our help. We stop keeping track of whether things are fair or whether we're doing more than our share. Instead, we start looking for ways to make other people's lives easier.
This doesn't mean we become pushovers or let people take advantage of us. It means we find purpose in being useful. When we visit a friend, we wash their dishes before we leave. When we see someone struggling with grocery bags, we help carry them. When someone needs a ride, we don't sigh and complain—we're glad we can be the answer to their need. We discover that serving others actually fills us up instead of wearing us out. It gives us meaning when we might otherwise feel useless or forgotten.
Suggestions
Here are two practical ways to serve:
Look for the invisible work. At church gatherings or family dinners, notice what needs doing that nobody wants to do. Clean up the spills. Stack the chairs. Take out the trash. Wash the dishes. These aren't glamorous jobs, but they're the ones Jesus would do. Don't announce what you're doing or wait for thanks. Just quietly make things better.
Honor someone publicly each month. Write a thank you note to your mail carrier. Tell your pastor specifically what you appreciate about last Sunday's sermon. Leave a generous tip with a kind note for your server. Compliment someone's character, not just their appearance. When we honor others, we're saying "I see you, and what you do matters." In a world where people feel invisible, that's a powerful gift.
Into Action
This week, serve someone in a way that costs you something—your time, your comfort, or your pride. Maybe it's helping an elderly neighbor with a task they can't do anymore. Maybe it's babysitting for a stressed young parent who needs a break. Maybe it's volunteering for the job at church that nobody else wants.
The key is to serve without expecting anything back. Don't serve hoping for thanks or recognition. Don't keep score. Just do it because that's what Jesus did. He washed dirty feet. He touched lepers. He helped people who couldn't pay Him back.
A real person who lives this way: Consider Jimmy Carter. After serving as president, he could have spent his retirement giving speeches and making money. Instead, he picked up a hammer and helped build houses with Habitat for Humanity well into his nineties. He taught Sunday school at his small hometown church for decades. He didn't act like he was too important for ordinary service. When asked about it, he said he was just following Jesus's example. Carter showed us that no matter how successful we become, there's always room to serve. And some of the most important work happens when we're willing to do the simple, humble tasks that need doing. At his age and with his accomplishments, he could have demanded honor. Instead, he chose to honor others through service.
Prayer Focus
"Lord Jesus, You showed us what true greatness looks like when You knelt down and washed dirty feet. Help me to have that same servant's heart. When I see someone who needs help, give me the humility to offer it. When I'm tempted to think I'm too important for simple acts of service, remind me that You never considered any act of love beneath You. Help me to honor others the way You honor me. Let my willingness to serve show my family what it means to follow You. Make me more like You every day. In Your servant name, Amen."
Session
4: Practice Humility and Gentleness
Ephesians
4:2, Proverbs 15:1, Matthew 11:29, Colossians 3:12
Study Notes — Handout — Audio
Key Idea: A gentle spirit reflects God's heart and helps heal relationships.
Scripture:
"Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other" (Ephesians 4:2)
"A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare" (Proverbs 15:1)
"Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart" (Matthew 11:29)
“He has shown you, O man, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.” (Micah 6:8 )
What to Look For
As you study these verses, notice three things. First, see how humility and gentleness are described as always being needed, not just in special situations. Second, look at how gentle responses can change the direction of difficult conversations. Third, watch how Jesus describes His own character as humble and gentle, making this a key part of being like Him.
Personal Reflection Questions
The Phone Call Test: When a telemarketer or wrong number calls during dinner, does your voice show irritation or patience? What would gentleness sound like in that moment?
The Last Word Question: When someone in your family says something that bothers you, do you feel like you have to get the last word, or can you let it go with a gentle response?
Overview
Our culture celebrates being loud, bold, and assertive. We're told to "speak our truth," "stand up for ourselves," and "don't let anyone push you around." Social media rewards the snarkiest comment and the quickest comeback. Politicians and celebrities get attention by being outrageous, not gentle. But in this environment of harsh words and quick anger, a person who responds with gentleness and humility stands out like a cool breeze on a hot day. People are so used to being attacked or dismissed that genuine gentleness surprises them and often melts their defenses.
This May Surprise You
Here's something that might surprise you about gentleness. Many people think being gentle means being weak or letting people walk all over you. But the word "gentle" in the Bible comes from a Greek word that described a powerful horse that had been trained. The horse still had all its strength, but it had learned to control that strength. Gentleness isn't weakness—it's strength under control. When we respond gently to harsh words, we're not being weak. We're being so strong that we don't need to prove it by fighting back.
Seeds for Thought
Point 1: "Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other" (Ephesians 4:2) Comment: Paul says "always"—not just when we feel like it or when people deserve it. Humility and gentleness are supposed to be our normal way of treating people, even when they're being difficult or unreasonable.
Point 2: "A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare" (Proverbs 15:1) Comment: This is practical wisdom that works. When someone comes at us with anger, we have a choice: we can pour gasoline on the fire with harsh words, or we can put the fire out with a gentle response. Gentleness has real power to change situations.
Point 3: "Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart" (Matthew 11:29) Comment: Jesus describes His own heart as humble and gentle. If we want to be like Jesus, this is what our hearts should look like too. It's not just what we do—it's who we are becoming.
Point 4: “He has shown you, O man, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.” (Micah 6:8) Comment: To live with fairness and equity, especially toward the vulnerable. It’s a call to uphold justice not just in courts or policies, but in personal relationships and community life.
Take-Home Thought
Humility and gentleness are like oil in the engine of relationships. Without them, everything grinds and breaks down. With them, relationships run smoothly even under pressure. When we practice humility, we admit we don't have all the answers and we can learn from others. When we practice gentleness, we handle people's hearts with care, knowing that everyone has been hurt and everyone needs kindness. This is especially important as we get older. We have more experience and knowledge than younger family members, and it's easy to become impatient with their mistakes or critical of their choices. But when we respond with humility and gentleness, we create safe spaces where people can grow and learn. Our grandchildren will remember not just what we taught them, but how we made them feel when they were learning. Harsh words might correct behavior for the moment, but gentle words shape hearts for a lifetime.
Quotes
Francis de Sales: "Nothing is so strong as gentleness, nothing so gentle as real strength."
John Chrysostom: "A soft answer breaks the bone; that is, breaks the most stubborn resistance."
Similar Scripture
James 3:13 “If you are wise and understand God’s ways, prove it by living an honorable life, doing good works with the humility that comes from wisdom.”
1 Peter 3:8 “Finally, all of you should be of one mind. Sympathize with each other. Love each other as brothers and sisters. Be tenderhearted, and keep a humble attitude.”
Philippians 2:3 “Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves.”
Proverbs 11:2 “Pride leads to disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.”
James 4:10 “Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up in honor.”
Proverbs 22:4 “True humility and fear of the Lord lead to riches, honor, and long life.”
Romans 12:16 “Live in harmony with each other. Don’t be too proud to enjoy the company of ordinary people. And don’t think you know it all!”
1 Peter 5:6 “So humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and at the right time he will lift you up in honor.”
Biblical Connection
The theme of gentleness appears throughout Scripture:
Moses described as "very humble, more than all people" (Numbers 12:3)
David's gentleness making him great (2 Samuel 22:36)
The fruit of the Spirit includes gentleness (Galatians 5:23)
Instructions to restore others "in a spirit of gentleness" (Galatians 6:1)
Humility as a character trait is emphasized repeatedly:
"Humble yourselves before the Lord" (James 4:10)
"God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble" (1 Peter 5:5)
The humble being exalted (Luke 14:11)
Jesus washing feet as an act of humility (John 13:1-17)
The power of gentle words:
"Gracious words are like a honeycomb" (Proverbs 16:24)
"A gentle tongue is a tree of life" (Proverbs 15:4)
Jesus' gentle treatment of sinners (John 8:1-11)
Paul's gentle approach to ministry (1 Thessalonians 2:7)
How Does This Help Me Trust God Today?
When we choose humility and gentleness instead of defending ourselves or proving we're right, we're trusting that God will take care of our reputation and our relationships. The world tells us to fight for respect, but God says when we humble ourselves, He will lift us up. This builds our faith because we learn that gentle responses often work better than harsh ones, and humble attitudes often earn more respect than proud ones. We discover that trusting God's way of handling conflicts brings more peace than trying to win every argument.
Legacy Lens
How to Model This: Let your grandchildren hear you respond gently when someone is rude to you on the phone or in public. When they make mistakes, correct them with patience instead of harsh criticism. Show them that strong people don't need to prove their strength by being loud or mean.
Teaching Example: "You know, when someone is mean to me, my first thought is to be mean right back. But I've learned that gentle words usually work better than angry ones. It takes more strength to be gentle than to be harsh."
Action Toolbox
Story to Share: Tell about a time when someone's gentle response to your anger or frustration completely changed your attitude. Explain how their gentleness helped you calm down and see things differently.
Simple Activity: For one week, practice the "gentle pause" - when someone says something that irritates you, count to three before responding, and try to make your response gentler than your first impulse. Notice how this affects your conversations.
Conversation Starter: "I've been thinking about how Jesus was both strong and gentle. What do you think that looked like when He dealt with difficult people?"
Changed Life
This teaching changes how we respond when we're right and someone else is wrong. We've all been in situations where we knew we were right—someone criticized us unfairly, spread gossip about us, or blamed us for something that wasn't our fault. Our natural response is to defend ourselves loudly, to make sure everyone knows the truth, to win the argument.
But this scripture calls us to something different. It asks us to respond with gentleness even when we have every right to be angry. That's hard. It goes against everything in us that wants justice and vindication.
Here's what changes: we start to care more about healing relationships than about being proven right. We learn that winning an argument often means losing a friendship. We discover that a soft answer really does calm things down, while harsh words—even true ones—just make everything worse. We begin to see that humility isn't weakness. It's strength under control. It's choosing peace over pride. And when we live this way, we sleep better at night. We carry less bitterness. We build bridges instead of walls.
Suggestions
Here are two ways to practice this:
Count to ten before responding to criticism. When someone says something that stings, don't fire back immediately. Take a breath. Count to ten. Pray a quick prayer asking God to help you respond gently. You might say "I need to think about that" and walk away for a bit. This simple pause can keep you from saying something you'll regret. It gives your emotions time to settle so your gentleness can come through.
Admit when you're wrong—quickly and fully. When you mess up, don't make excuses or try to shift blame. Just say "I was wrong. I'm sorry. Will you forgive me?" Those are some of the hardest words to say, but they're also some of the most powerful. When we're quick to admit our mistakes, it makes us easier to live with. It shows real humility. And it often softens the other person's heart too.
Into Action
This week, practice gentleness in a specific relationship that's been difficult. Maybe there's tension with a family member. Maybe you've been in an ongoing disagreement with a friend. Maybe someone at church rubs you the wrong way.
Instead of avoiding them or rehearsing all the reasons you're right, reach out with gentleness. If you need to have a hard conversation, start by affirming something you appreciate about them. Listen more than you talk. Assume the best about their intentions. If they're upset with you, don't get defensive. Ask gentle questions to understand their perspective. You might say "Help me understand how you're feeling" or "I can see this really matters to you."
A real person who lives this way: Think about Mister Rogers' wife, Joanne Rogers. After Fred died, reporters and authors constantly asked her questions, sometimes very personal ones. Some people criticized Fred or questioned whether he was really as gentle as he seemed. Joanne could have gotten defensive or angry. Instead, she responded to everyone—even critics—with the same gentleness Fred had shown. When asked how she dealt with difficult questions, she said she tried to understand why people were asking and what they really needed to know. She showed us that gentleness isn't just for easy conversations. It's especially important when we're tired, grieving, or being challenged. Gentleness is a choice we make over and over, even when it would be easier to snap back or shut down.
Prayer Focus
"Lord Jesus, You described Yourself as humble and gentle at heart. I want to be like You in this way. When someone makes me angry, help me respond with gentleness instead of harshness. When I'm tempted to prove how much I know, help me listen with humility instead. Give me strength to control my tongue and my temper. Help my family see Your gentleness in the way I treat them and others. Make my heart more like Yours every day. In Your gentle name, Amen."
Session
5: Be Just and Fair
Deuteronomy
16:19, Isaiah 1:17, Luke 6:31, Deuteronomy 24:17
Study Notes — Handout — Audio
Key Idea: God calls us to treat everyone fairly and stand up for what's right.
Scripture:
"Do not twist justice in legal matters" (Deuteronomy 16:19)
"Learn to do good. Seek justice. Help the oppressed" (Isaiah 1:17)
"Do to others as you would like them to do to you" (Luke 6:31)
"True justice must be given to foreigners living among you and to orphans" (Deuteronomy 24:17)
What to Look For
As you read these verses, notice how God cares about fair treatment for everyone. Look for the connection between doing good and seeking justice. Watch for God's special concern for people who can't protect themselves.
Personal Reflection Questions
Think about a time when someone treated you unfairly. How did that make you feel, and what would fair treatment have looked like?
If you could give one piece of advice to a store manager about treating customers fairly, what would it be?
Overview
These Bible passages speak directly to our world today. We see unfairness everywhere - in workplaces, schools, and communities. Some people get special treatment while others are ignored or mistreated. God's word reminds us that fairness isn't just a nice idea - it's His command. Whether we're dealing with a rude cashier, watching how immigrants are treated, or seeing elderly people dismissed, God calls us to be different. We're meant to be people who stand up for what's right and treat everyone with dignity.
This May Surprise You
Many people think being "fair" means treating everyone exactly the same. But God's justice is different. Notice that Deuteronomy 24:17 specifically mentions giving "true justice" to foreigners and orphans. This means going out of our way to help those who are vulnerable or have less power. True fairness sometimes means giving extra help to those who need it most, just like a good parent might spend more time helping a struggling child with homework.
Seeds for Thought
"Do not twist justice in legal matters" (Deuteronomy 16:19) Comment: This warns against changing the rules to benefit ourselves or people we like. Fair is fair, regardless of who's involved.
"Learn to do good. Seek justice. Help the oppressed" (Isaiah 1:17) Comment: Notice the order: learn to do good first, then actively look for ways to make things right. It's not enough to avoid doing wrong - we must do right.
"Do to others as you would like them to do to you" (Luke 6:31) Comment: This golden rule puts us in the other person's shoes. Before we act, we ask: "How would I want to be treated in this situation?"
"True justice must be given to foreigners living among you and to orphans" (Deuteronomy 24:17) Comment: God has a special heart for people who can't speak up for themselves. This includes anyone who feels like an outsider or has no voice.
Take-Home Thought
God's plan for justice starts with His people. He doesn't expect governments or organizations to fix everything - He expects us to be His hands and feet in everyday situations. When we treat the grocery store clerk with respect, when we speak up for someone being gossiped about, when we're patient with a confused elderly person, we're living out God's justice.
This isn't about being a superhero or changing the whole world. It's about small, daily choices that reflect God's heart. Every time we choose fairness over favoritism, kindness over convenience, we're showing others what God is like. Our grandchildren are watching how we treat the restaurant server, how we talk about people who are different from us, and how we respond when we see someone being mistreated.
Quotes
Charles Spurgeon: "Justice is truth in action. We must not only think right thoughts but do right deeds."
Corrie ten Boom: "When we are powerless to do a thing, it is a great joy that we can come and step inside the ability of Jesus."
Similar Scripture
Proverbs 21:3 “The Lord is more pleased when we do what is right and just than when we offer him sacrifices.”
Psalm 82:3 “Give justice to the poor and the orphan; uphold the rights of the oppressed and the destitute.”
Micah 6:8 “No, O people, the Lord has told you what is good, and this is what he requires of you: to do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.”
Proverbs 31:9 “Yes, speak up for the poor and helpless, and see that they get justice.”
Leviticus 19:15 “Do not twist justice in legal matters by favoring the poor or being partial to the rich and powerful. Always judge people fairly.”
Zechariah 7:9 “This is what the Lord of Heaven’s Armies says: Judge fairly, and show mercy and kindness to one another.”
Psalm 37:28 “For the Lord loves justice, and he will never abandon the godly. He will keep them safe forever, but the children of the wicked will die.”
2 Chronicles 19:7 “Fear the Lord and judge with integrity, for the Lord our God does not tolerate perverted justice, partiality, or the taking of bribes.”
Biblical Connection
Matthew 23:23 - Jesus talks about justice, mercy, and faithfulness as the "more important matters of the law"
Micah 6:8 - "What does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God"
James 1:27 - Pure religion includes caring for orphans and widows
Leviticus 19:15 - "Do not pervert justice; do not show partiality to the poor or favoritism to the great"
How Does This Help Me Trust God Today?
When we see unfairness in the world, we can feel helpless and angry. But God's call to be just and fair reminds us that He's still in control and still working through His people. We can trust that our small acts of fairness matter to Him and make a difference. When we stand up for what's right, even in small ways, we're partnering with God in His plan to bring justice to the world.
Legacy Lens
Our grandchildren learn more from what they see us do than what they hear us say. When they watch us treat everyone with respect - the janitor, the waitress, the person with a disability - they learn what God's love looks like.
Example: When dining out with grandchildren, treat the server with kindness even if service is slow. Thank them by name, be patient, and tip fairly. Afterward, talk about how everyone deserves respect regardless of their job.
Action Toolbox
Story to Share: Tell about a time when someone showed you unexpected kindness or fairness. Maybe a boss who gave you a second chance, or a neighbor who helped when others wouldn't. Share how it made you feel and how it changed your day.
Activity: Practice the "Golden Rule Check" - before making decisions about how to treat someone, pause and ask: "How would I want to be treated if I were in their situation?"
Changed Life
This teaching changes how we treat people who are different from us or who don't have a voice. It's easy to be fair to people we like, people who are like us, people who can do something for us in return. But God calls us to treat everyone fairly—even people who can't repay us, even people we disagree with, even people who look or think differently than we do.
When we take this to heart, we start noticing unfairness we used to ignore. We see when someone gets talked over in a conversation. We notice when certain people always get picked last or left out. We recognize when someone is being judged by their appearance or their past instead of who they are now.
This scripture pushes us to speak up, not just feel bad. When we hear gossip, we defend the person being talked about. When we see someone being treated poorly, we don't just look away. When decisions are being made, we ask "is this fair to everyone, or just fair to people like me?" We become people who make sure others get a fair shake, especially those who can't fight for themselves. It makes us uncomfortable sometimes, but it also makes us more like Jesus.
Suggestions
Here are two ways to practice fairness:
Include the outsider. At church, at family gatherings, in your neighborhood—look for the person standing alone. The new person who doesn't know anyone. The widow who lost her social circle when her husband died. The person with special needs who gets overlooked. Make it your mission to include them. Sit with them. Introduce them to others. Invite them to lunch. Make sure they're not invisible.
Speak up when something isn't right. This doesn't mean being argumentative or causing trouble. It means gently pointing out unfairness when you see it. If someone makes a joke at another person's expense, don't just laugh along. You might say "that doesn't seem fair to say." If someone is being excluded or judged, ask "what if we looked at it differently?" You don't have to be loud or angry. Just be honest and fair.
Into Action
This week, look for one situation where you can stand up for fairness. Maybe there's someone in your church or community who gets treated unfairly—gossiped about, left out, or judged harshly. Don't just feel sorry for them. Do something.
It might mean defending their reputation when others criticize them. It might mean making sure they're included in an invitation. It might mean helping them get access to something they need but can't afford or can't get to on their own. Ask yourself "if I were in their shoes, what would fair treatment look like?"
A real person who lives this way: Consider John Lewis, who recently passed away. He spent his whole life fighting for fairness and justice, starting when he was young. He marched peacefully for civil rights even though people beat him and arrested him. He could have gotten bitter or given up, but he kept working to make things fair for everyone. Later, as a congressman, he still showed up at protests well into his eighties, still fighting for people who were treated unfairly. He didn't just fight for people like him—he fought for anyone who was being pushed down or pushed out. He used to say "If you see something that is not right, not fair, not just, you have a moral obligation to do something about it." John Lewis showed us that standing up for justice isn't a one-time thing. It's a lifetime commitment. And it doesn't require being famous or powerful. It just requires being willing to speak up and show up for what's right.
Prayer Focus
"God, help us see people the way You see them. Give us courage to stand up for what's right, even when it's hard. Show us opportunities to treat others fairly and help those who can't help themselves. Make us examples of Your love and justice to our families and communities. Amen."
Session
6: Forgive Freely and Graciously
Luke
6:37, Ephesians 4:32, Proverbs 17:9, Matthew 6:14
Study Notes — Handout — Audio
Key Idea: Since God has forgiven us, we must forgive others.
Scripture:
"Forgive others, and you will be forgiven" (Luke 6:37)
"Be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you" (Ephesians 4:32)
"Love prospers when a fault is forgiven, but dwelling on it separates close friends" (Proverbs 17:9)
"If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you" (Matthew 6:14)
What to Look For
As you read these verses, notice the connection between God's forgiveness and our forgiveness of others. Look for how forgiveness helps relationships grow stronger. Watch for the warning about what happens when we refuse to forgive.
Personal Reflection Questions
Think about someone who hurt you years ago. When you see their name or face today, do you feel peace or does your stomach still tighten up?
If you had to explain forgiveness to a seven-year-old using only everyday objects from your kitchen, what would you use and why?
Overview
Forgiveness might be the hardest thing God asks us to do. We live in a world that says "get even" and "don't let anyone walk on you." But God calls us to something completely different. At our age, we've collected a lifetime of hurts - family members who disappointed us, friends who betrayed us, people who took advantage of our kindness. Some wounds run so deep we can still feel the sting decades later. Yet Jesus says forgiveness isn't optional for His followers. It's not about letting people off the hook - it's about freeing ourselves from the prison of bitterness.
This May Surprise You
Many people think forgiveness means saying "it's okay" or pretending the hurt never happened. But that's not biblical forgiveness. True forgiveness means choosing to release our right to get even, even when the hurt was real and the person was wrong. We can forgive someone and still set healthy boundaries. We can forgive and still feel sad about what happened. Forgiveness doesn't erase consequences or mean we have to trust someone who proved untrustworthy. It means we stop carrying their debt in our hearts.
Seeds for Thought
"Forgive others, and you will be forgiven" (Luke 6:37) Comment: This isn't about earning God's forgiveness through our works. It shows that forgiven people become forgiving people. Our willingness to forgive reveals whether we truly understand what God has done for us.
"Be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you" (Ephesians 4:32) Comment: The key phrase is "just as God through Christ has forgiven you." We forgive because we've been forgiven. When we remember how much God has forgiven us, forgiving others becomes possible.
"Love prospers when a fault is forgiven, but dwelling on it separates close friends" (Proverbs 17:9) Comment: This shows forgiveness is practical wisdom. Relationships die when we keep bringing up old hurts. They grow when we choose to let go and move forward together.
"If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you" (Matthew 6:14) Comment: This doesn't mean we earn God's forgiveness, but shows that understanding His forgiveness changes how we treat others. An unforgiving heart suggests we don't really grasp what we've received.
Take-Home Thought
God's plan for forgiveness breaks the cycle of hurt that can poison families for generations. When we choose to forgive, we stop passing bitterness down to our children and grandchildren. Instead, we model grace and show them a better way to handle life's inevitable hurts.
This doesn't mean forgiveness is easy or quick. Sometimes it's a daily choice, especially for deep wounds. But every time we choose to let go of resentment instead of rehearsing our hurts, we become a little more like Jesus. Our grandchildren will face their own disappointments and betrayals. When they do, they'll remember how Grandma or Grandpa handled difficult people with grace instead of grudges.
Quotes
Lewis Smedes: "To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you."
C.S. Lewis: "Everyone thinks forgiveness is a lovely idea until he has something to forgive."
Similar Scripture
Colossians 3:13 “Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.”
Mark 11:25 “But when you are praying, first forgive anyone you are holding a grudge against, so that your Father in heaven will forgive your sins, too.”
Matthew 18:21–22 “Then Peter came to him and asked, ‘Lord, how often should I forgive someone who sins against me? Seven times?’ ‘No, not seven times,’ Jesus replied, ‘but seventy times seven!’”
Psalm 86:5 “O Lord, you are so good, so ready to forgive, so full of unfailing love for all who ask for your help.”
Micah 7:18 “Where is another God like you, who pardons the guilt of the remnant, overlooking the sins of his special people? You will not stay angry with your people forever, because you delight in showing unfailing love.”
Matthew 6:12 “And forgive us our sins, as we have forgiven those who sin against us.”
2 Chronicles 7:14 “Then if my people who are called by my name will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sins and restore their land.”
Proverbs 28:13 “People who conceal their sins will not prosper, but if they confess and turn from them, they will receive mercy.”
Biblical Connection
Matthew 18:21-35 - The parable of the unforgiving servant who was forgiven much but wouldn't forgive little
Colossians 3:13 - "Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone"
1 Peter 4:8 - "Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins"
Romans 12:19 - "Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God's wrath"
How Does This Help Me Trust God Today?
When someone hurts us and seems to get away with it, we can trust that God sees everything and will handle justice in His way and time. This frees us from trying to be judge and jury. We can also trust that God will give us the strength to forgive when we feel like we can't. Forgiveness isn't something we do in our own power - it's a supernatural work that God does through us when we're willing.
Legacy Lens
Our grandchildren are watching how we handle conflict and disappointment. When they see us choose forgiveness over revenge, patience over payback, they learn that there's a better way to live than carrying grudges.
Example: If a family member says something hurtful at a gathering, instead of gossiping about it later or giving them the cold shoulder, find a private moment to address it directly and kindly. Show your grandchildren that relationships are worth fighting for and that love covers mistakes.
Action Toolbox
Story to Share: Tell about someone who forgave you when you didn't deserve it - maybe a parent, teacher, or friend. Share how their forgiveness changed your heart and made you want to do better.
Activity: The "Forgiveness Letter" - Write a letter to someone who hurt you (you don't have to send it). Express your feelings honestly, then write "I choose to forgive you" at the bottom. This helps move forgiveness from your head to your heart.
Changed Life
This teaching changes how we handle being hurt. We've all been wounded by someone—a friend who betrayed our trust, a family member who said cruel things, someone who took advantage of our kindness. The hurt is real, and the pain doesn't just disappear because we're told to forgive.
But holding onto unforgiveness is like drinking poison and hoping the other person gets sick. It eats away at us. We replay the hurt over and over. We imagine what we should have said. We build walls around our hearts to keep from being hurt again. And in the process, we become bitter and small.
When we choose to forgive, everything shifts. We're not saying what they did was okay. We're not pretending it didn't hurt. We're simply deciding that we won't let their wrong control our life anymore. We release them from the debt they owe us and trust God to handle the accounts.
Here's what changes: we sleep better. We stop rehearsing old arguments. We have energy for new relationships instead of nursing old wounds. We become softer instead of harder. And we discover that forgiveness isn't just a gift we give someone else—it's a gift we give ourselves. We find freedom we didn't know we were missing.
Suggestions
Here are two ways to practice forgiveness:
Write it down and let it go. When someone hurts you, write down exactly what they did and how it made you feel. Don't hold back—get it all out on paper. Then pray over that piece of paper, telling God you're choosing to forgive this person and release this hurt. Some people even burn the paper or tear it up as a symbol of letting go. The act of writing and releasing helps move forgiveness from your head to your heart.
Stop telling the story. We often keep wounds fresh by retelling what happened to anyone who'll listen. We get others on our side, building a case against the person who hurt us. But every time we retell it, we relive it. Instead, when you're tempted to bring up an old hurt, catch yourself. Say a quick prayer for the person instead. If you need to talk about it, talk to God or a trusted counselor—not to everyone at church.
Into Action
This week, think of one person you need to forgive. Maybe it's someone from long ago—a parent who wasn't there for you, a friend who abandoned you, a spouse who hurt you deeply. Maybe it's something more recent. The hurt might be big or small, but it's taken up residence in your heart.
Make a decision to forgive them. This doesn't mean you have to tell them or restore the relationship if it's unhealthy. Forgiveness is between you and God. You might pray "God, I choose to forgive [name] for [what they did]. I release them from what they owe me. Help me let go of this hurt."
If possible and safe, consider reaching out—not to rehash the past, but to take a step toward healing. It might be a simple phone call, a card, or just a kind word the next time you see them.
A real person who lives this way: Consider Corrie ten Boom. During World War II, she and her family hid Jewish people in their home in Holland. They were caught and sent to concentration camps, where her beloved sister Betsie died. After the war, Corrie traveled around talking about God's love and forgiveness. One day, a man approached her after she spoke—one of the cruel guards from the camp where Betsie died. He had become a Christian and asked for her forgiveness. Corrie said it was the hardest thing she ever had to do. She couldn't find it in herself to forgive him. But she prayed for help, reached out her hand, and chose to forgive. She said that at that moment, she felt God's love flow through her in a way she'd never experienced. Corrie showed us that forgiveness isn't a feeling—it's a choice we make even when everything in us wants to hold onto the hurt. And when we make that choice, God gives us the strength to follow through.
Prayer Focus
"Father, thank You for forgiving all our sins through Jesus. Help us remember how much You've forgiven us when we struggle to forgive others. Give us Your heart of compassion for those who hurt us. Show us when to set boundaries and when to extend grace. Help us break cycles of bitterness in our families and leave a legacy of love. Amen."
Session
7: Promote Peace and Unity
Matthew
5:9, Romans 12:18, 1 Peter 3:11, Ephesians 4:3
Study Notes — Handout — Audio
Key Idea: God calls us to be peacemakers who bring people together.
Scripture:
"God blesses those who work for peace, for they will be called the children of God" (Matthew 5:9)
"Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone" (Romans 12:18)
"Search for peace, and work to maintain it" (1 Peter 3:11)
"Make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace" (Ephesians 4:3)
What to Look For
As you read these verses, notice how peacemaking is active work, not passive wishing. Look for the effort required to build and keep peace. Watch for how peace connects us to God's family and reflects His character.
Personal Reflection Questions
Think about the most peaceful person you know. What do they do differently when conflicts arise around them?
If your family were a recipe, what ingredient would you add to make it more peaceful and harmonious?
Overview
Our world seems more divided than ever. Families split over politics, neighbors argue over property lines, and even church members disagree about everything from music styles to mask wearing. In the middle of all this tension, God calls His people to be different. We're meant to be the ones who bring calm to chaos, who build bridges instead of walls. At our age, we've seen enough conflict to know that fighting rarely solves anything lasting. We have the wisdom and experience to be peacemakers, but it takes intentional effort and sometimes real courage to stand in the gap when others want to argue.
This May Surprise You
Many people think being a peacemaker means avoiding all conflict or always giving in to keep the peace. But biblical peacemaking is much stronger than that. Sometimes real peace requires addressing problems directly and honestly. A true peacemaker might need to have hard conversations, set clear boundaries, or even confront someone who's causing division. The goal isn't to avoid all disagreement - it's to handle disagreement in ways that preserve relationships and honor God. Peace isn't the absence of conflict; it's the presence of God's way of handling conflict.
Seeds for Thought
"God blesses those who work for peace, for they will be called the children of God" (Matthew 5:9) Comment: Notice it says "work for peace" - this is active, not passive. When we bring peace to difficult situations, we're acting like God's children. It's one of the ways people can see our family resemblance to our heavenly Father.
"Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone" (Romans 12:18) Comment: The phrase "all that you can" recognizes that sometimes peace isn't possible despite our best efforts. We're responsible for our part, not for controlling other people's responses. This gives us freedom to try without guaranteeing the outcome.
"Search for peace, and work to maintain it" (1 Peter 3:11) Comment: Peace requires both finding it and keeping it. We actively look for ways to create harmony, then we work just as hard to protect and preserve it once we have it. It's like tending a garden - constant, gentle care.
"Make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace" (Ephesians 4:3) Comment: Unity doesn't just happen; it takes effort from everyone involved. Peace becomes the rope that ties us together even when we might naturally drift apart. It's what holds relationships together during storms.
Take-Home Thought
God's plan for peace starts in our own hearts and ripples outward through our relationships. When we choose to respond with grace instead of anger, when we listen before we speak, when we look for common ground instead of reasons to argue, we become agents of God's peace in our families and communities.
Our grandchildren are growing up in an angry, divided world. They need to see that there's another way to handle disagreement and tension. When they watch us calm down heated conversations, include the lonely person, or find ways to bring feuding relatives together, they learn that peace is possible. They discover that followers of Jesus don't have to participate in the culture of outrage and division. We can model a better way - not weak or wimpy, but strong enough to choose love over being right.
Quotes
Martin Luther King Jr.: "Nonviolence is a powerful and just weapon, which cuts without wounding and ennobles the man who wields it. It is a sword that heals."
Francis of Assisi: "Lord, make me an instrument of your peace. Where there is hatred, let me bring love. Where there is discord, let me bring harmony."
Similar Scripture
Psalm 133:1 “How wonderful and pleasant it is when brothers live together in harmony!”
Hebrews 12:14 “Work at living in peace with everyone, and work at living a holy life, for those who are not holy will not see the Lord.”
Colossians 3:15 “And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.”
Philippians 2:2 “Then make me truly happy by agreeing wholeheartedly with each other, loving one another, and working together with one mind and purpose.”
Romans 15:5–6 “May God, who gives this patience and encouragement, help you live in complete harmony with each other, as is fitting for followers of Christ Jesus. Then all of you can join together with one voice, giving praise and glory to God.”
1 Corinthians 1:10 “I appeal to you, dear brothers and sisters, by the authority of our Lord Jesus Christ, to live in harmony with each other. Let there be no divisions in the church. Rather, be of one mind, united in thought and purpose.”
Galatians 5:22–23 “But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things.”
James 3:18 “And those who are peacemakers will plant seeds of peace and reap a harvest of righteousness.”
Biblical Connection
Isaiah 9:6 - Jesus is called the "Prince of Peace"
John 14:27 - "I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart"
Romans 14:19 - "Let us aim for harmony in the church and try to build each other up"
2 Corinthians 13:11 - "Live in harmony and peace. Then the God of love and peace will be with you"
Psalm 34:14 - "Turn away from evil and do good. Search for peace, and work to maintain it"
How Does This Help Me Trust God Today?
When we're surrounded by conflict and division, we can trust that God is still in control and still working through peacemakers to heal broken relationships. We can trust that our efforts to bring peace - even small ones - matter to Him and make a real difference. When we feel overwhelmed by all the arguing and tension around us, we can find peace in knowing that God has called us to be part of His solution, not part of the problem.
Legacy Lens
Our grandchildren will face plenty of conflict in their lives - at school, at work, and even in their own families someday. When they do, they'll remember how we handled disagreements and tension. Did we add fuel to the fire or help put it out?
Example: When family members start arguing about politics at a gathering, gently redirect the conversation: "You know, we all love this family and want what's best for everyone. How about we focus on what we agree on?" Then change the subject to shared memories or upcoming family events.
Action Toolbox
Story to Share: Tell about a time when someone helped you make peace with another person, or when you successfully helped two people work out their differences. Focus on the practical steps that led to reconciliation.
Activity: The "Peace Bridge" - When you see two people in conflict, pray about whether God wants you to help build a bridge between them. Sometimes it's as simple as saying something good about each person to the other.
Changed Life
This teaching changes how we respond when there's conflict around us. We live in a world full of division—families split over politics, churches divided over preferences, neighbors at odds over petty disagreements. It's easy to pick a side, fuel the fire, or just walk away and let people fight it out.
But God calls us to something different. He calls us to be peacemakers, not troublemakers or peacekeepers. There's a difference. Peacekeepers just avoid conflict and pretend everything's fine. Peacemakers actually work to heal the division. They step into the mess and help people find common ground.
When we take this seriously, it changes our conversations. We stop adding fuel to fires by spreading gossip or taking sides. We stop saying things like "can you believe what she did?" Instead, we say "have you talked to her about it?" We look for what unites people instead of what divides them. We remind feuding friends of the good times they shared. We help family members see past their differences to the love that's still there.
This doesn't mean we ignore real problems or pretend disagreements don't matter. It means we refuse to let those disagreements destroy relationships. We become people who build bridges instead of walls. And here's the surprising part—when we work for peace, we find more peace in our own hearts too.
Suggestions
Here are two ways to promote peace:
Refuse to gossip or take sides. When someone comes to you complaining about another person, resist the urge to agree with them and pile on. Instead, ask "have you talked to them directly?" or "what do you think they were trying to accomplish?" Help them see the other person's perspective. If they're really hurt, listen with compassion, but gently encourage them toward reconciliation rather than division.
Find common ground in difficult conversations. When you're with people who disagree about politics, church decisions, or family matters, look for what everyone can agree on. You might say "I know we see this differently, but we all want what's best for our community" or "we may disagree on the details, but we all love this church." Remind people of their shared values and history. Help them remember they're on the same team.
Into Action
This week, look for one place where you can be a peacemaker. Maybe there are two friends who aren't speaking to each other. Maybe there's tension in your family over an old argument. Maybe your church is divided over a decision. Don't just hope it gets better—do something.
It might mean sitting down with both people separately and listening to their side, then helping them understand each other. It might mean hosting a meal where feuding family members can reconnect over food and memories. It might mean speaking up in a church meeting to remind everyone of what really matters.
Be prepared—peacemaking can be risky. You might get blamed by both sides. You might not succeed. But do it anyway, because that's what children of God do. We work for peace even when it's hard.
A real person who lives this way: Consider Desmond Tutu from South Africa. When his country was torn apart by apartheid and then by the pain of reconciliation, he could have chosen anger and revenge. Instead, he led the Truth and Reconciliation Commission, bringing victims and perpetrators face to face. He believed that only truth and forgiveness could heal his nation's deep wounds. He wasn't naive about the evil that had happened. He wept with victims and confronted perpetrators. But he refused to let hatred win. He once said "My humanity is bound up in yours, for we can only be human together." Tutu showed us that real peace isn't cheap or easy. It requires honesty about wrong, genuine repentance, and costly forgiveness. But it's the only path that actually heals. He taught us that we can hold people accountable and still work toward reconciliation. And he proved that one person committed to peace can help an entire nation begin to heal.
Prayer Focus
"Prince of Peace, help us be Your peacemakers in our families and communities. Give us wisdom to know when to speak up and when to stay quiet. Help us listen more than we talk and love more than we judge. Use us to heal broken relationships and bring harmony where there is division. Make our homes places of peace that draw others to You. Amen."
Session
8: Speak Truthfully and with Grace
Colossians
4:6, Leviticus 19:11, Ephesians 4:15, Proverbs 15:4
Study Notes — Handout — Audio
Key Idea: Our words should be both honest and kind.
Scripture:
"Let your conversation be gracious and attractive so that you will have the right response for everyone" (Colossians 4:6)
"Do not steal or cheat or lie to each other" (Leviticus 19:11)
"Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ" (Ephesians 4:15)
"Gentle words are a tree of life" (Proverbs 15:4)
What to Look For
As you read these verses, notice how truth and kindness work together, not against each other. Look for how our words can either give life or cause harm. Watch for the balance between being honest and being gracious in our conversations.
Personal Reflection Questions
Think of someone whose words always made you feel better about yourself. What did they say differently than other people?
If you had to choose between being completely honest or being completely kind in a difficult conversation, which would you pick and why?
Overview
At our age, we've learned that words have power. We've seen how a careless comment can wound someone for years, and we've experienced how the right words at the right time can heal deep hurts. We've also learned that people don't always want to hear the truth, especially when it's uncomfortable. But God calls us to speak both truthfully and gracefully - not choosing one over the other, but finding ways to combine honesty with kindness. This is especially important as grandparents and mentors. The young people in our lives need to hear truth from us, but they also need to feel our love in how we deliver that truth.
This May Surprise You
Many people think you have to choose between being truthful and being kind - that "speaking the truth in love" means sugarcoating hard truths until they lose their meaning. But biblical truth-telling is actually more powerful than harsh honesty. When we speak difficult truths with genuine love and concern, people are more likely to listen and less likely to get defensive. The goal isn't to make truth more palatable, but to make sure our heart motivation is love, not judgment. Sometimes the most loving thing we can do is tell someone a hard truth they need to hear, but how we say it makes all the difference.
Seeds for Thought
"Let your conversation be gracious and attractive so that you will have the right response for everyone" (Colossians 4:6) Comment: The word "attractive" here means our words should draw people closer, not push them away. When we speak with grace, people want to keep talking with us. We become safe people to approach with problems and questions.
"Do not steal or cheat or lie to each other" (Leviticus 19:11) Comment: This connects lying with stealing and cheating because dishonesty steals trust from relationships. When we lie - even little white lies - we rob others of the chance to make decisions based on truth. Honesty is a gift we give to others.
"Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ" (Ephesians 4:15) Comment: Truth without love is just criticism. Love without truth is just sentiment. But when we combine both, we become more like Jesus, who perfectly balanced grace and truth. This helps us and others grow spiritually.
"Gentle words are a tree of life" (Proverbs 15:4) Comment: Just like a tree gives life through oxygen, shade, and fruit, gentle words give life to relationships and to people's spirits. Our words can be medicine that heals or poison that destroys - the choice is ours.
Take-Home Thought
God's plan for our words is that they would be tools for building up rather than tearing down. Every conversation is an opportunity to reflect God's character - His perfect blend of truth and love. When we speak honestly but kindly, we show others what God is like. When we choose gentle words over harsh ones, we demonstrate that strength doesn't require harshness.
Our grandchildren are learning how to communicate by watching us. When they see us tell the truth without being cruel, when they hear us disagree without being disagreeable, when they observe us giving hard feedback with obvious care, they learn that it's possible to be both honest and loving. In a world full of harsh criticism and fake niceness, they need to see authentic grace - truth spoken with genuine love and concern for the other person's well-being.
Quotes
Maya Angelou: "Words mean more than what is set down on paper. It takes the human voice to infuse them with deeper meaning."
John Chrysostom: "The bee is more honored than other animals, not because she labors, but because she labors for others. So should we speak - not merely to benefit ourselves, but to benefit others."
Similar Scripture
Proverbs 16:24 “Kind words are like honey—sweet to the soul and healthy for the body.”
James 1:19 “Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.”
Proverbs 12:18 “Some people make cutting remarks, but the words of the wise bring healing.”
Psalm 15:2 “Those who lead blameless lives and do what is right, speaking the truth from sincere hearts.”
Zechariah 8:16 “But this is what you must do: Tell the truth to each other. Render verdicts in your courts that are just and that lead to peace.”
Proverbs 10:32 “The lips of the godly speak helpful words, but the mouth of the wicked speaks perverse words.”
James 3:17 “But the wisdom from above is first of all pure. It is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and the fruit of good deeds. It shows no favoritism and is always sincere.”
Psalm 34:13 “Then keep your tongue from speaking evil and your lips from telling lies!”
Biblical Connection
Proverbs 18:21 - "The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit"
James 3:5-6 - The tongue is a small part of the body that can cause great damage
Matthew 12:36 - "But I tell you that everyone will have to give account on the day of judgment for every empty word they have spoken"
Proverbs 25:11 - "A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver"
1 Thessalonians 5:11 - "Therefore encourage one another and build each other up"
How Does This Help Me Trust God Today?
When we struggle with difficult conversations or feel tempted to either lie to avoid conflict or speak harshly because we're frustrated, we can trust that God will give us the right words at the right time. We don't have to choose between being truthful and being kind - God can help us find ways to be both. When others speak unkindly to us, we can trust that God sees and will help us respond with grace instead of returning harsh words.
Legacy Lens
Our grandchildren live in a world where people often communicate through screens rather than face-to-face. They need to learn the art of gracious, truthful conversation from us. When they see how we handle difficult discussions with love and honesty, they learn communication skills that will serve them well in marriage, parenting, and friendships.
Example: When a grandchild shares a problem they're facing, resist the urge to immediately give advice or fix it. Instead, listen first, ask gentle questions, and then share your thoughts in a way that shows you believe in their ability to make good choices. "That sounds really hard. What do you think might work best?"
Action Toolbox
Story to Share: Tell about a time when someone told you a difficult truth in a loving way that helped you grow or change. Focus on how their approach made you able to hear what you needed to hear.
Activity: The "24-Hour Rule" - When you feel the urge to say something harsh or critical, wait 24 hours and pray about it first. Often, God will show you a better way to express your concern or help you realize the words don't need to be said at all.
Changed Life
This teaching changes how we use our words every single day. We've all been on both sides of hurtful speech. We've said things we regret—spoken harsh truths without love, or told little lies to avoid conflict. And we've been wounded by others' words—brutal honesty that cut deep, or sweet-sounding lies that betrayed our trust.
God calls us to something better. He wants our words to be both true and kind. That's not easy. Sometimes the truth is hard to hear. Sometimes being kind feels like we're avoiding the truth. But this scripture shows us we don't have to choose between honesty and grace. We can have both.
When we live this way, our words start to heal instead of hurt. We learn to tell the truth without being cruel. We can say "I disagree" without saying "you're stupid." We can point out a problem without attacking the person. We stop exaggerating to make our point. We quit stretching the truth to make ourselves look better or to get out of trouble.
Here's what changes: people start to trust us. They know we'll be honest with them, but they also know we care about their feelings. They don't have to wonder if we're talking about them behind their backs, because they know we say the same things in front of their faces. Our relationships get stronger because they're built on truth spoken in love.
Suggestions
Here are two ways to practice truthful, gracious speech:
Pause before you speak hard truths. When you need to say something difficult, take a moment to ask yourself two questions: "Is this true?" and "Is this kind?" If it's true but not kind, figure out how to say it with grace. If it's kind but not true, don't say it at all. You might start hard conversations with "I care about you, and I need to talk to you about something difficult" or "This is hard for me to say, but I think you need to hear it."
Stop the small lies. Pay attention to how often you stretch the truth in little ways—exaggerating stories to make them more interesting, making excuses instead of admitting you forgot, saying you're fine when you're not. These seem harmless, but they chip away at trust. Practice saying simple truths: "I forgot," "I made a mistake," "I'm actually struggling today." People respect honesty, even about small things.
Into Action
This week, focus on your words in one specific relationship. Maybe you've been avoiding a hard conversation because you don't want to hurt someone's feelings. Maybe you've been too harsh with someone and need to speak more gently. Maybe you've been dishonest—even in small ways—and need to come clean.
If you need to have a difficult conversation, pray about it first. Ask God to help you speak truth with love. Plan what you'll say so you don't just blurt out something hurtful. Start with something you appreciate about the person. Then share the truth gently and directly. Give them space to respond.
If you've been too harsh, apologize. Tell them you're working on speaking with more grace. Ask them to forgive you for how you've spoken to them.
A real person who lives this way: Consider the way Billy Graham handled tough questions. As a preacher for over sixty years, he was constantly asked about controversial topics and difficult issues. He could have avoided hard truths to keep everyone happy, or he could have been harsh and judgmental. Instead, he became known for speaking biblical truth with genuine kindness. When asked about people's sins or failures, he would acknowledge the truth but always point toward God's grace and hope. He once said "It is the Holy Spirit's job to convict, God's job to judge, and my job to love." Graham showed us that we can hold firm to truth without being harsh or mean. He never compromised what he believed, but he also never attacked people. Even those who disagreed with him often said they felt respected and loved by him. He proved that truth and grace aren't enemies—they're partners. And when we speak with both, our words carry weight and bring healing.
Prayer Focus
"Lord, help us use our words to build others up, not tear them down. Give us wisdom to know when to speak and when to stay quiet. Help us tell the truth with love and gentleness. Guard our tongues from gossip, criticism, and lies. Make our conversations a blessing to others and a reflection of Your grace. May our words point people toward You. Amen."
Session
9: Care for the Vulnerable and Marginalized
Isaiah
1:17, Leviticus 23:22, Matthew 25:40, James 1:27, Leviticus
19:33–34
Study Notes — Handout — Audio
Key Idea: God has a special heart for those who are hurting or left out.
Scripture:
"Learn to do good. Seek justice. Help the oppressed. Defend the cause of orphans. Fight for the rights of widows" (Isaiah 1:17)
"When you harvest your crops, do not harvest the grain along the edges of your fields, and do not pick up what the harvesters drop. Leave it for the poor and the foreigners living among you" (Leviticus 23:22)
"When you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!" (Matthew 25:40)
"Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress" (James 1:27)
“When a foreigner resides among you in your land, do not mistreat them. The foreigner residing among you must be treated as your native-born. Love them as yourself, for you were foreigners in Egypt. I am the Lord your God.” (Leviticus 19:33–34)
What to Look For
As you read these verses, notice how God specifically names those who need extra help - orphans, widows, foreigners, and the poor. Look for the connection between true religion and caring for vulnerable people. Watch for how God sees our care for others as care for Him personally.
Personal Reflection Questions
Think about a time when you felt overlooked or invisible. Who noticed you and made you feel seen and valued?
If Jesus came to visit your neighborhood disguised as someone in need, how do you think He would be treated, and would you recognize Him?
Overview
At our stage of life, many of us are becoming more aware of our own vulnerabilities. We might need help with technology, feel ignored in busy stores, or worry about being forgotten as we age. This gives us a unique understanding of what it means to feel marginalized or overlooked. God's heart has always been especially tender toward those who can't speak up for themselves or who society tends to ignore. As followers of Jesus, we're called to notice the people others miss and to extend God's love to those who feel forgotten or cast aside.
This May Surprise You
When God talks about caring for the vulnerable, He's not just asking us to feel sorry for people or to give charity when it's convenient. He's calling us to develop eyes that see people the way He sees them - as precious individuals with dignity and worth. The Hebrew word for "oppressed" in Isaiah 1:17 literally means "crushed" - these are people who have been flattened by life's circumstances. God isn't asking us to fix everyone's problems, but He is asking us to treat vulnerable people with the same respect and kindness we'd want for ourselves. Sometimes the greatest gift we can give someone is simply acknowledging their worth as a person made in God's image.
Seeds for Thought
"Learn to do good. Seek justice. Help the oppressed. Defend the cause of orphans. Fight for the rights of widows" (Isaiah 1:17) Comment: Notice the active words - learn, seek, help, defend, fight. This isn't passive sympathy but intentional action. God wants us to actively look for ways to help those who can't help themselves, just as He actively looks out for us.
"When you harvest your crops, do not harvest the grain along the edges of your fields, and do not pick up what the harvesters drop. Leave it for the poor and the foreigners living among you" (Leviticus 23:22) Comment: This shows God's wisdom in helping people maintain their dignity. The poor could work to gather food rather than just receive handouts. God built care for the vulnerable into the economic system, making it normal and expected, not exceptional charity.
"When you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!" (Matthew 25:40) Comment: This transforms how we see acts of kindness to vulnerable people. Jesus doesn't just approve of our care for others - He receives it as personal care for Himself. Every cup of cold water, every visit, every word of encouragement goes directly to Jesus.
"Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress" (James 1:27) Comment: God defines real religion not by how much we know about Him or how often we attend church, but by how we treat the most vulnerable people in our community. This is the proof that our faith is genuine.
“When a foreigner resides among you in your land, do not mistreat them. The foreigner residing among you must be treated as your native-born. Love them as yourself, for you were foreigners in Egypt. I am the Lord your God.” (Leviticus 19:33–34) Comment: This is a radical call to empathy and justice, rooted in Israel’s own history of suffering and displacement. God commands His people not only to avoid mistreatment of foreigners but to actively love them—with the same depth and sincerity as they love themselves.
Take-Home Thought
God's plan for caring for the vulnerable isn't just about meeting physical needs - though that's important. It's about creating a community where everyone belongs and no one is forgotten. When we reach out to the lonely elderly person, include the awkward teenager, or help the struggling single parent, we're building the kind of community God intended.
Our grandchildren are watching how we treat people who are different from us or who seem to have less to offer. When they see us show kindness to the person with disabilities, respect to the immigrant family, or patience with the elderly person who moves slowly, they learn that every person has value. They discover that following Jesus means looking out for those who can't look out for themselves. This is especially important in our success-driven culture that often discards people who aren't productive or profitable.
Quotes
Mother Teresa: "We cannot all do great things, but we can do small things with great love."
Dietrich Bonhoeffer: "We must learn to regard people less in the light of what they do or omit to do, and more in the light of what they suffer."
Similar Scripture
Deuteronomy 10:18 “He ensures that orphans and widows receive justice. He shows love to the foreigners living among you and gives them food and clothing.”
Psalm 82:3–4 “Give justice to the poor and the orphan; uphold the rights of the oppressed and the destitute. Rescue the poor and helpless; deliver them from the grasp of evil people.”
Proverbs 14:31 “Those who oppress the poor insult their Maker, but helping the poor honors him.”
Zechariah 7:10 “Do not oppress widows, orphans, foreigners, and the poor. And do not scheme against each other.”
Deuteronomy 15:11 “There will always be some in the land who are poor. That is why I am commanding you to share freely with the poor and with other Israelites in need.”
Luke 14:13–14 “But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, and the blind. Then at the resurrection of the righteous, God will reward you for inviting those who could not repay you.”
Isaiah 58:10 “Feed the hungry, and help those in trouble. Then your light will shine out from the darkness, and the darkness around you will be as bright as noon.”
Proverbs 31:8–9 “Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves; ensure justice for those being crushed. Yes, speak up for the poor and helpless, and see that they get justice.”
Biblical Connection
Psalm 68:5 - "Father to the fatherless, defender of widows—this is God, whose dwelling is holy"
Deuteronomy 10:18 - "He ensures that orphans and widows receive justice. He shows love to the foreigners living among you"
Proverbs 31:8-9 - "Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves; ensure justice for those being crushed"
Luke 14:13-14 - Jesus says to invite the poor, crippled, lame, and blind to our feasts
Galatians 2:10 - Paul was eager to remember the poor
How Does This Help Me Trust God Today?
When we see suffering and injustice around us, it can be overwhelming and discouraging. But knowing that God has a special heart for the vulnerable helps us trust that He sees every need and every act of kindness. We don't have to solve every problem, but we can trust that our small acts of love matter deeply to God. When we feel vulnerable ourselves, we can trust that the same God who calls us to care for others is watching over us with tender concern.
Legacy Lens
Our grandchildren will inherit a world where it's easy to ignore people who are struggling or different. They need to learn from us that every person has dignity and worth because they're made in God's image. When they see us treating all people with respect and kindness, they learn to see others through God's eyes.
Example: When grocery shopping with grandchildren, let them help you donate to the food bank collection or smile and speak kindly to the bagger with disabilities. Explain afterward: "God loves that person just as much as He loves us, and so should we."
Action Toolbox
Story to Share: Tell about someone who showed you unexpected kindness when you were going through a difficult time. Focus on how their care made you feel valued and reminded you that you weren't forgotten.
Activity: The "Invisible People Prayer" - Each week, pray specifically for people in your community who might feel overlooked: the lonely widow, the immigrant family, the person with mental illness, the struggling single parent. Ask God to show you practical ways to demonstrate His love to them.
Changed Life
This teaching changes who we notice and who we help. It's human nature to pay attention to people who are successful, popular, or powerful. We gravitate toward people who can do something for us. We focus on people who are like us. Meanwhile, the vulnerable and marginalized become invisible—the elderly shut-in, the single mom struggling to make ends meet, the immigrant who doesn't speak English well, the person with mental illness who makes us uncomfortable.
But God says He measures our faith by how we treat the people everyone else overlooks. The widow. The orphan. The stranger. The poor. The ones with no power, no influence, no way to pay us back. When we care for them, Jesus says we're caring for Him.
When we take this seriously, it changes everything. We start seeing people we used to walk past. We notice the elderly woman at church who always sits alone. We think about the family down the street who can barely afford groceries. We pay attention to the person with special needs who gets left out of conversations. We wonder about the refugee family trying to build a new life in a strange place.
And we don't just feel sorry for them—we do something. We realize that if we have more than we need while others don't have enough, God expects us to share. Not out of guilt or obligation, but because that's what love does. It looks out for the vulnerable. It makes sure nobody gets forgotten.
Suggestions
Here are two ways to care for the vulnerable:
Adopt someone who's alone. Think about the vulnerable people in your circle—someone who has no family nearby, someone who's lost their spouse, someone who's sick and homebound, someone new to the area. Make them part of your life. Call them regularly, not just when you think of it. Invite them for holidays. Take them to doctor appointments. Remember their birthday. Help with tasks they can't do anymore. Treat them like family, because that's what they need most.
Share your resources intentionally. Look at what you have—time, money, skills, space—and ask "who needs this?" Maybe you can tutor a struggling student. Maybe you can help someone with their taxes or paperwork. Maybe you can give regularly to a local ministry that serves the poor. Maybe you can use your car to drive people who don't have transportation. Don't wait for people to ask. Notice what they need and offer specifically.
Into Action
This week, identify one vulnerable or marginalized person in your community and take action to help them. Not in a vague, someday kind of way. Do something concrete this week.
Maybe it's the widow who needs help cleaning out her gutters. Maybe it's the single mom who could use a break—offer to watch her kids for an afternoon. Maybe it's the homeless person you see regularly—learn their name, buy them a meal, treat them with dignity. Maybe it's the immigrant family at church—invite them to your home, help them with English, show them they belong.
The key is to move beyond feeling bad for people to actually helping them. Ask yourself "what would make their life easier or better right now?" Then do that thing.
A real person who lives this way: Consider Mother Teresa. She spent her life caring for the poorest of the poor in Calcutta, India—people dying on the streets whom everyone else stepped over. She picked them up, cleaned their wounds, and gave them dignity in their final hours. She didn't just help people who could be fixed or who deserved it by society's standards. She helped everyone—the sick, the dying, the abandoned, the ones society had given up on. When people asked why she bothered with people who would die anyway, she said "It's not about what we accomplish. It's about how much love we put into what we do." Mother Teresa showed us that every single person matters to God, especially the ones the world has forgotten. She proved that we don't need great resources to make a difference—we just need great love. And she taught us that caring for the vulnerable isn't something we do when it's convenient. It's who we are as followers of Jesus.
Prayer Focus
"Heavenly Father, thank You for seeing and caring for us when we feel vulnerable or forgotten. Open our eyes to see the people around us who are hurting or left out. Give us hearts of compassion and hands ready to help. Show us practical ways to demonstrate Your love to those who need it most. Help us remember that when we serve others, we're serving You. Amen."
Session
10: Encourage and Build Up Others
1
Thessalonians 5:11, Galatians 6:2, Proverbs 12:25, Ephesians 4:29
Study Notes — Handout — Audio
Key Idea: Our words and actions should help others grow stronger in faith.
Scripture:
"Encourage each other and build each other up" (1 Thessalonians 5:11)
"Share each other's burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ" (Galatians 6:2)
"Worry weighs a person down; an encouraging word cheers a person up" (Proverbs 12:25)
"Don't use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them" (Ephesians 4:29)
What to Look For
As you read these verses, notice how encouragement is both a command and a gift we give to others. Look for the power of words to either lift up or weigh down someone's spirit. Watch for how sharing burdens connects us to Christ's heart of love.
Personal Reflection Questions
Think of a time when someone's encouraging words came at exactly the right moment in your life. What did they say, and why did it mean so much?
If you were a vitamin that people could take when they felt discouraged, what would your "active ingredient" be and how would it help them?
Overview
At our age, we've lived long enough to know that life can be hard and discouraging. We've watched family members face serious illness, seen friends lose spouses, and experienced our own share of disappointments and losses. But we've also learned something valuable - the incredible power of encouragement. We know how much it means when someone notices our struggles and offers a word of hope or a helping hand. God calls us to be encouragers, especially now when we have the wisdom to know what really matters and the time to invest in other people's lives.
This May Surprise You
Many people think encouragement means always saying positive things or pretending everything is fine when it's not. But biblical encouragement is much deeper than that. The word "encourage" literally means "to give courage to" - to help someone find the strength to keep going when they want to give up. Sometimes the most encouraging thing we can do is simply sit with someone in their pain without trying to fix it or cheer them up. Other times, encouragement means lovingly challenging someone to grow or change. True encouragement doesn't ignore problems; it helps people face them with God's strength and hope.
Seeds for Thought
"Encourage each other and build each other up" (1 Thessalonians 5:11) Comment: Building someone up is like construction work - it takes time, effort, and the right materials. Our encouragement should help people become stronger and more stable in their faith, not just feel better temporarily. We're helping construct their spiritual foundation.
"Share each other's burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ" (Galatians 6:2) Comment: When we help carry someone else's load, we're following Christ's example of taking on our burdens. This isn't just being nice - it's obeying God's law of love. Sometimes encouragement means practical help, not just words.
"Worry weighs a person down; an encouraging word cheers a person up" (Proverbs 12:25) Comment: This shows the physical and emotional impact of our words. Worry literally weighs people down like a heavy backpack, but encouragement lifts that weight off their shoulders. Our words have the power to change someone's entire day.
"Don't use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them" (Ephesians 4:29) Comment: This isn't just about avoiding bad words - it's about making sure all our words serve a good purpose. Before we speak, we can ask: "Will this help or hurt? Will this build up or tear down?"
Take-Home Thought
God's plan for encouragement creates a cycle of hope and strength in the body of Christ. When we encourage others, they become stronger and more able to encourage someone else. Our investment in one person's faith often multiplies as they pass that encouragement along to others.
As grandparents and mature believers, we have a special opportunity to be encouragers. Young people today face pressures and challenges we never experienced - social media comparison, career uncertainty, relationship confusion. They need our wisdom, our prayers, and our belief in them. When we tell our grandchildren that we're proud of them, when we share stories of how God has been faithful in our lives, when we remind them of their strengths and potential, we're giving them courage to face whatever comes. Our encouragement today may be the memory that sustains them through difficult times in the future.
Quotes
Charles Spurgeon: "A word of encouragement during a failure is worth more than an hour of praise after success."
Billy Graham: "Comfort and encourage one another with these words—the words of eternal life, words of hope in a hopeless world."
Similar Scripture
Hebrews 10:24–25 “Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works. And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.”
Romans 15:2 “We should help others do what is right and build them up in the Lord.”
Philippians 2:4 “Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.”
Isaiah 35:3–4 “With this news, strengthen those who have tired hands, and encourage those who have weak knees. Say to those with fearful hearts, ‘Be strong, and do not fear, for your God is coming to destroy your enemies. He is coming to save you.’”
Job 4:4 “Your words have supported those who were falling; you encouraged those with shaky knees.”
2 Corinthians 1:3–4 “All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others.”
Proverbs 27:17 “As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.”
Acts 20:35 “And I have been a constant example of how you can help those in need by working hard. You should remember the words of the Lord Jesus: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’”
Biblical Connection
Hebrews 3:13 - "You must warn each other every day, while it is still 'today,' so that none of you will be deceived by sin and hardened against God"
Romans 1:12 - "When we get together, I want to encourage you in your faith, but I also want to be encouraged by yours"
2 Corinthians 1:3-4 - God comforts us so we can comfort others with the same comfort
Hebrews 10:24-25 - "Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works"
Ecclesiastes 4:12 - "A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer"
How Does This Help Me Trust God Today?
When we feel discouraged ourselves, we can trust that God will provide encouragement through other believers - sometimes in ways we don't expect. When we're struggling to know how to help someone who's hurting, we can trust that God will give us the right words or show us practical ways to help. Our efforts to encourage others are never wasted because God uses them in ways we may never see.
Legacy Lens
Our grandchildren will face discouragement and setbacks throughout their lives. They need to learn from us how to receive encouragement gracefully and how to give it generously. When they see us lifting up others with our words and actions, they learn that followers of Jesus don't just look out for themselves.
Example: When a grandchild is struggling with school, sports, or friendships, resist the urge to minimize their problems or immediately offer solutions. Instead, listen carefully, acknowledge their feelings, and remind them of times they've overcome challenges before. "I remember when you were afraid to start middle school, but look how well you handled that. You're stronger than you think."
Action Toolbox
Story to Share: Tell about someone who encouraged you during a difficult season of your life. Describe specifically what they did or said that made a difference, and how their encouragement helped you get through that time.
Activity: The "Encouragement Challenge" - Each week, intentionally look for one person who seems discouraged or overwhelmed. It might be a cashier having a bad day, a neighbor dealing with health issues, or a family member facing stress. Find a specific way to encourage them - a compliment, a helping hand, a listening ear, or a note of appreciation.
Changed Life
This teaching changes how we impact the people around us every single day. We all know what it's like to feel discouraged—when life is hard, when we've failed at something, when we wonder if we matter or if anyone notices us. In those moments, a word of encouragement can be like water in a desert.
But here's what we often forget: we have the power to be that encouragement for someone else. Our words can lift people up or tear them down. Our actions can make someone's burden lighter or heavier. And most of us are walking around carrying burdens that nobody else knows about.
When we embrace this teaching, we stop being so focused on our own problems that we miss the struggles of others. We start looking for people who need a boost. We notice when someone seems down. We pay attention to who's carrying a heavy load. And instead of just thinking "I should say something," we actually do it.
Here's what changes: we become people others are glad to see. We become safe places where people can admit they're struggling. We help others keep going when they want to quit. And surprisingly, when we spend our energy building others up, we feel stronger too. Encouragement is like a boomerang—when we throw it out to others, it comes back to us.
Suggestions
Here are two ways to encourage others:
Send one encouragement each day. Make it a daily habit. Send a text telling someone what you appreciate about them. Leave a voicemail for someone who's going through a hard time. Mail a card to someone you haven't talked to in a while. The key is to be specific. Don't just say "you're great." Say "I noticed how patient you were with that difficult situation" or "I've always admired your faithfulness to your family." Specific encouragement shows you really see people.
Ask "how can I help?" and mean it. When someone shares a struggle, we usually say "let me know if you need anything." But people rarely ask. Instead, offer something specific. "Can I bring you dinner Tuesday?" "Can I drive you to that appointment?" "Can I pray with you right now?" When we offer concrete help, we're not just saying nice words—we're actually carrying part of their burden.
Into Action
This week, think of one person who's carrying a heavy burden right now. Maybe they're going through a health crisis, dealing with a difficult family situation, struggling financially, or just feeling worn down by life. Don't wait for them to ask for help.
Reach out to them this week with both encouragement and practical help. Tell them specifically what you see in them that's strong or admirable. Then do something tangible to lighten their load. It doesn't have to be big—even small acts of help mean the world when you're struggling.
Also, pay attention to your words this week. Notice when you're tempted to criticize, complain, or gossip. Stop yourself and say something encouraging instead. Look for the good in people and point it out. Speak life into the people around you.
A real person who lives this way: Consider Mister Rogers again, but this time focusing on how he encouraged others. Fred Rogers received thousands of letters from children and adults who were struggling. He could have had an assistant respond with form letters. Instead, he personally answered as many as he could, often calling people on the phone to encourage them through hard times. He kept pictures sent by children with disabilities on his office wall and prayed for them by name. When he met people—whether famous or ordinary—he made them feel like the most important person in the world. He would look them in the eye and ask real questions about their lives. People said that after five minutes with Fred Rogers, they felt seen, valued, and stronger. He once said "There are three ways to ultimate success: The first way is to be kind. The second way is to be kind. The third way is to be kind." Fred Rogers showed us that encouragement isn't complicated. It's simply paying attention to people, seeing the best in them, and telling them what you see. It's being genuinely interested in their lives. It's treating every person like they matter, because they do.
Prayer Focus
"Lord, help us be people who build others up instead of tearing them down. Give us eyes to see when someone needs encouragement and hearts willing to reach out. Help us remember how much Your encouragement has meant to us, and make us channels of that same hope to others. Use our words and actions to strengthen faith and spread joy. Amen."
Session
11: Be Generous and Share
Luke
6:30, Romans 12:13, Hebrews 13:16, 2 Corinthians 9:7
Study Notes — Handout — Audio
Key Idea: God wants us to give freely because He has given so much to us.
Scripture:
"Give to anyone who asks" (Luke 6:30)
"When God's people are in need, be ready to help them. Always be eager to practice hospitality" (Romans 12:13)
"Don't forget to do good and to share with those in need. These are the sacrifices that please God" (Hebrews 13:16)
"You must each decide in your heart how much to give. And don't give reluctantly or in response to pressure. For God loves a person who gives cheerfully" (2 Corinthians 9:7)
What to Look For
As you read these verses, notice how generosity is connected to our relationship with God and our joy in giving. Look for the balance between being generous and being wise about how we give. Watch for how hospitality and sharing are presented as acts of worship.
Personal Reflection Questions
Think about the most generous person you've known. What made them generous - was it their money, their time, their heart, or something else?
If you could only give away things you couldn't buy with money, what would be the most valuable gift you could offer someone?
Overview
At our stage of life, many of us have experienced both having plenty and having little. We've learned that real security doesn't come from how much we accumulate, but from trusting in God's provision. We've also discovered that some of our greatest joy has come not from what we received, but from what we were able to give to others. God calls us to be generous people - not just with money, but with our time, our wisdom, our hospitality, and our encouragement. As seniors, we have unique opportunities to be generous in ways that younger people might not be able to match.
This May Surprise You
When Jesus said "Give to anyone who asks," He wasn't necessarily commanding us to give money to every person who requests it. The broader context of Scripture teaches us to be wise stewards of what God has given us. Biblical generosity means having a heart that's ready to give and looking for opportunities to help others, but it also includes wisdom about when and how to give. Sometimes the most generous thing we can do is teach someone to fish instead of giving them a fish. Other times, generous love means setting boundaries with people who might take advantage of our kindness. True generosity flows from a grateful heart, not from guilt or pressure.
Seeds for Thought
"Give to anyone who asks" (Luke 6:30) Comment: This challenges our natural tendency to judge who "deserves" our help. While we should use wisdom, our default attitude should be generosity rather than suspicion. We look for ways to say yes rather than reasons to say no.
"When God's people are in need, be ready to help them. Always be eager to practice hospitality" (Romans 12:13) Comment: Being "ready" means we've already decided in our hearts to be generous before the need arises. Hospitality isn't just having people over for dinner - it's creating space in our lives for others and making them feel welcome and valued.
"Don't forget to do good and to share with those in need. These are the sacrifices that please God" (Hebrews 13:16) Comment: Our sharing and good works are called "sacrifices" because they cost us something - time, money, comfort, or convenience. But unlike Old Testament sacrifices, these offerings bring life and joy to both the giver and receiver.
"You must each decide in your heart how much to give. And don't give reluctantly or in response to pressure. For God loves a person who gives cheerfully" (2 Corinthians 9:7) Comment: God cares more about the heart behind our giving than the amount we give. Cheerful giving comes from understanding how much God has given us and wanting to share that blessing with others. It's not about obligation but about overflow.
Take-Home Thought
God's plan for generosity creates a beautiful cycle of blessing. When we give freely from what He has given us, we experience the joy of participating in His work of caring for others. Our generosity also demonstrates to a watching world that there's something different about people who follow Jesus - we're not driven by greed or fear, but by gratitude and trust.
As grandparents, we have a special opportunity to model generous living for the next generation. When our grandchildren see us sharing our time, our resources, and our homes with others, they learn that life is about more than accumulating things for ourselves. They discover that true joy comes from giving, not just getting. In a culture that constantly tells them to focus on themselves, our example of generosity shows them a better way to live.
Quotes
John Wesley: "Do all the good you can, by all the means you can, in all the ways you can, in all the places you can, at all the times you can, to all the people you can, as long as ever you can."
C.S. Lewis: "I do not believe one can settle how much we ought to give. I am afraid the only safe rule is to give more than we can spare."
Similar Scripture
Proverbs 11:25 “The generous will prosper; those who refresh others will themselves be refreshed.”
Luke 6:38 “Give, and you will receive. Your gift will return to you in full—pressed down, shaken together to make room for more, running over, and poured into your lap. The amount you give will determine the amount you get back.”
Acts 20:35 “And I have been a constant example of how you can help those in need by working hard. You should remember the words of the Lord Jesus: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’”
2 Corinthians 9:6 “Remember this—a farmer who plants only a few seeds will get a small crop. But the one who plants generously will get a generous crop.”
Proverbs 22:9 “Blessed are those who are generous, because they feed the poor.”
Matthew 6:3–4 “But when you give to someone in need, don’t let your left hand know what your right hand is doing. Give your gifts in private, and your Father, who sees everything, will reward you.”
Deuteronomy 15:10 “Give generously to the poor, not grudgingly, for the Lord your God will bless you in everything you do.”
Psalm 112:5 “Good comes to those who lend money generously and conduct their business fairly.”
Biblical Connection
Acts 20:35 - "It is more blessed to give than to receive"
Matthew 6:19-21 - "Store up treasures in heaven... For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also"
1 Timothy 6:18 - "Tell them to use their money to do good. They should be rich in good works and generous to those in need"
Proverbs 11:25 - "The generous will prosper; those who refresh others will themselves be refreshed"
Luke 12:48 - "When someone has been given much, much will be required in return"
How Does This Help Me Trust God Today?
When we're tempted to hoard our resources out of fear for the future, we can trust that God will continue to provide for our needs as we're generous to others. When we're not sure if we have enough to share, we can trust that God sees our heart to give and will bless our willingness to help others. Our generosity demonstrates our trust that God is our true source of security.
Legacy Lens
Our grandchildren are growing up in a materialistic culture that measures success by possessions and encourages them to focus on themselves. They need to see from us that there's greater joy in giving than in getting, and that true wealth comes from having a generous heart.
Example: When eating out with grandchildren, let them help you leave a generous tip and explain: "We want to be a blessing to our server because God has been such a blessing to us." Or involve them in choosing gifts for families in need during the holidays, letting them experience the joy of giving.
Action Toolbox
Story to Share: Tell about a time when someone's unexpected generosity made a big difference in your life. Maybe it was financial help during a tough time, or someone who shared their time and wisdom when you needed guidance. Focus on how their generosity reflected God's love to you.
Activity: The "Generosity Inventory" - Make a list of all the ways God has been generous to you (not just money, but health, family, friends, experiences, opportunities). Then ask God to show you specific ways you can share those blessings with others. Remember, you can be generous with a smile, a listening ear, or your presence even if money is tight.
Changed Life
This teaching changes how we think about our money and possessions. Most of us naturally hold tight to what we have. We worked hard for it. We earned it. It's ours. We worry about having enough for tomorrow, so we save and protect and keep.
But the gospel turns this thinking upside down. Everything we have is actually a gift from God. Our health that lets us work. Our minds that let us learn. The opportunities we've had. Even the breath in our lungs. None of it is really ours—we're just managing it for a while. And God asks us to be generous managers who share freely with others.
When we embrace this, something surprising happens. We stop clutching our wallets so tightly. We start to see our resources as tools for blessing others instead of treasures to hoard. We discover that giving actually brings more joy than keeping. We sleep better knowing we helped someone who was struggling. We feel lighter when we share instead of stockpile.
Here's what really changes: we stop living in fear that there won't be enough. We start trusting that God will provide what we need. We learn that generosity doesn't make us poor—it makes us rich in the ways that matter. And we find that the more we give, the more we want to give. Generosity becomes a joy, not a burden.
Suggestions
Here are two ways to practice generosity:
Give before you're asked. Don't wait for people to tell you they need help—pay attention and give before they have to ask. When you know someone's struggling with bills, slip them some cash or a gift card. When a young family can't afford to eat out, pick up their restaurant bill. When you hear about a need at church, be the first to meet it. Giving before being asked shows real love because it means you're paying attention to people's lives.
Practice joyful giving. Check your attitude when you give. Are you giving grudgingly, wishing you could keep the money? Are you giving to look good or get thanks? Or are you giving cheerfully because you're grateful for what God has given you? Before you give, pray and ask God to help you give with joy. Remember that every gift is an opportunity to share God's love. Make your giving an act of worship, not an obligation.
Suggestions
Here are two ways to practice generosity:
Set aside "generosity money" each month. Decide on an amount at the beginning of each month that's just for giving—beyond your regular church offering. Keep it separate. Then throughout the month, look for ways to use it. Buy groceries for someone who's short on food. Help with someone's medical bill. Give to the person asking for help at the intersection. Tip extra generously. When you've already set aside the money, you're ready to give immediately without debating whether you can afford it.
Share what you have, not just your money. Generosity isn't just about cash. Share your home by inviting people for meals. Share your skills by helping someone fix something or figure out their computer. Share your time by babysitting or running errands for someone who needs help. Share your garden produce, your baked goods, your extra coats. Look around at what you have and ask "who could use this?" Then share it freely.
Into Action
This week, practice generous giving in a way that stretches you a little. Not so much that it's foolish, but enough that you feel it. Maybe it means giving more than you planned to someone in need. Maybe it means buying a substantial gift card for a struggling family. Maybe it means opening your home to someone who needs a place to stay.
The key is to give cheerfully, not reluctantly. Before you give, thank God for what He's given you. Remember that you can't outgive God. Then give with joy, expecting nothing in return.
Also, practice hospitality this week. Invite someone to your home for a meal—maybe someone who's lonely, someone new to the area, or someone who can't easily return the favor. Don't worry about having a fancy house or cooking a perfect meal. Just share what you have and make them feel welcome.
A real person who lives this way: Consider Dave Thomas, who founded Wendy's restaurants. He was adopted as a child and never forgot what it felt like to need a family. After he became successful, he didn't just keep his wealth. He gave millions to adoption causes and personally appeared in ads encouraging people to adopt children from foster care. He used his fame to find homes for thousands of kids. But his generosity wasn't just about big donations. People who worked with him said he was generous in everyday ways too—tipping well, helping employees with personal problems, paying for strangers' meals. He once said "What do you do with your success? You give back." Dave Thomas showed us that generosity isn't just for special occasions or when we have extra. It's a way of life. Whether we have a little or a lot, we can share what we have with open hands and grateful hearts. And when we do, we find that giving is better than getting.
Prayer Focus
"Generous Father, thank You for all the ways You've blessed us throughout our lives. Help us see our possessions, our time, and our abilities as gifts from You to be shared with others. Give us hearts that are ready to give and eyes that see opportunities to help. Make us channels of Your blessing to those around us. May our generosity point others to Your love. Amen."
Session
12: Be Humble and Considerate
Ephesians
5:21, Proverbs 3:7, Philippians 4:5, 1 Peter 5:5
Study Notes — Handout — Audio
Key Idea: True strength comes from putting others first.
Scripture:
"Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ" (Ephesians 5:21)
"Don't be impressed with your own wisdom. Instead, fear the Lord and turn away from evil" (Proverbs 3:7)
"Be humble and considerate in everything you do" (Philippians 4:5)
"Clothe yourselves with humility as you relate to one another" (1 Peter 5:5)
What to Look For
As you read these verses, notice how humility is something we choose to put on like clothing. Look for the connection between humility and our relationship with God. Watch for how considering others reflects our reverence for Christ.
Personal Reflection Questions
Think of someone you consider truly humble. What do they do differently that shows their humility without them having to announce it?
If pride and humility were both guests at a dinner party, how would each one behave, and which one would you want to sit next to?
Overview
At our age, we've had enough life experience to learn some hard lessons about pride and humility. We've probably seen how pride can destroy relationships, hurt families, and distance us from God. We've also likely encountered truly humble people whose strength and wisdom impressed us far more than those who boasted about their accomplishments. True humility isn't thinking less of ourselves - it's thinking of ourselves less and considering how we can serve others and honor God. As mature believers, we have the opportunity to model the kind of humble strength that comes from knowing who we are in Christ.
This May Surprise You
Many people think humility means being weak, passive, or having low self-esteem. But biblical humility is actually a position of strength. It takes confidence and security to put others first, to admit when we're wrong, or to serve without needing recognition. Jesus was the most humble person who ever lived, yet He was also the strongest. Humility doesn't mean pretending we don't have gifts or abilities - it means using those gifts to benefit others rather than to promote ourselves. True humility comes from understanding our worth in God's eyes, which frees us from needing to prove our value to others.
Seeds for Thought
"Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ" (Ephesians 5:21) Comment: Mutual submission means we're all willing to put others' needs before our own when appropriate. We do this not because people deserve it, but because we love Christ and want to honor Him in how we treat others. It's motivated by worship, not weakness.
"Don't be impressed with your own wisdom. Instead, fear the Lord and turn away from evil" (Proverbs 3:7) Comment: The older we get, the more we realize how much we don't know. True wisdom begins with recognizing that God's wisdom is infinitely greater than ours. Being "impressed with our own wisdom" closes us off from learning and growing.
"Be humble and considerate in everything you do" (Philippians 4:5) Comment: "Everything" means there's no situation where pride or inconsideration is appropriate for a Christian. Humility and considerateness should mark all our interactions - with family, strangers, and even difficult people.
"Clothe yourselves with humility as you relate to one another" (1 Peter 5:5) Comment: The word "clothe" suggests humility is something we intentionally put on each day, like getting dressed. It's a daily choice to approach others with a servant's heart rather than demanding our own way or recognition.
Take-Home Thought
God's plan for humility creates harmony in relationships and brings honor to His name. When we choose to be humble and considerate, we create an atmosphere where others feel valued and respected. This reflects the heart of Jesus, who "came not to be served, but to serve."
Our grandchildren are growing up in a culture that constantly tells them to promote themselves, demand their rights, and put their needs first. They need to see from us that there's a better way - the way of humble service that brings true fulfillment and lasting relationships. When they watch us apologize when we're wrong, listen more than we talk, and consider others' needs alongside our own, they learn what Christian maturity looks like. They discover that real strength isn't about dominating others, but about lifting them up.
Quotes
Andrew Murray: "Humility is perfect quietness of heart. It is never to be fretted or vexed or irritated or sore or disappointed. It is to expect nothing, to wonder at nothing that is done to me."
John Stott: "Pride is your greatest enemy, humility is your greatest friend."
Similar Scripture
James 4:10 “Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up in honor.”
Romans 12:16 “Live in harmony with each other. Don’t be too proud to enjoy the company of ordinary people. And don’t think you know it all!”
Proverbs 22:4 “True humility and fear of the Lord lead to riches, honor, and long life.”
Colossians 3:12 “Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.”
Micah 6:8 “No, O people, the Lord has told you what is good, and this is what he requires of you: to do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.”
Luke 14:11 “For those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”
1 Peter 3:8 “Finally, all of you should be of one mind. Sympathize with each other. Love each other as brothers and sisters. Be tenderhearted, and keep a humble attitude.”
James 3:13 “If you are wise and understand God’s ways, prove it by living an honorable life, doing good works with the humility that comes from wisdom.”
Biblical Connection
Matthew 23:12 - "Those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted"
James 4:6 - "God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble"
Philippians 2:3-4 - "Don't be selfish; don't try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves"
Luke 14:11 - "For those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted"
Micah 6:8 - "What does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God"
How Does This Help Me Trust God Today?
When we're tempted to defend our reputation or insist on our rights, we can trust that God sees our heart and will honor our humility in His way and time. When others treat us with disrespect or overlook our contributions, we can trust that God notices and values our humble service. Our security comes from God's opinion of us, not from human recognition or status.
Legacy Lens
Our grandchildren will face constant pressure to promote themselves and compete with others for attention and recognition. They need to learn from us that true confidence comes from knowing who we are in Christ, and that the greatest people are often those who serve quietly behind the scenes.
Example: When you make a mistake in front of grandchildren, model humble accountability: "I was wrong about that, and I'm sorry. Thank you for correcting me." This shows them that admitting mistakes is a sign of strength, not weakness, and that we're never too old to learn and grow.
Action Toolbox
Story to Share: Tell about someone who demonstrated true humility in a way that impressed you - maybe someone who had good reasons to boast but chose to serve quietly instead, or someone who handled criticism or unfair treatment with grace.
Activity: The "Humility Check" - Before speaking in conversations this week, pause and ask: "Am I about to say this to help others or to make myself look good?" This simple question can help us catch prideful motivations before they come out of our mouths.
Changed Life
This teaching changes how we see ourselves and how we treat others. Our culture tells us to promote ourselves, to make sure we get credit, to fight for our rights, to look out for number one. We're taught that humility is weakness and that considerate people get trampled.
But Jesus shows us something completely different. He says real strength comes from putting others first. True greatness is found in serving, not in being served. The path to honor is through humility.
When we embrace this, everything shifts. We stop needing to be right all the time. We can admit when we don't know something. We can let someone else get the credit. We can defer to another person's preferences without feeling like we lost. We start thinking about how our choices affect others before we think about what we want.
Here's what changes: we become easier to live with. People aren't exhausted by our need for attention or frustrated by our unwillingness to consider their needs. We stop making everything about us. We notice what others need and care about. We ask "what would be best for everyone?" instead of "what do I want?"
And surprisingly, when we stop demanding respect, we often receive more of it. When we quit promoting ourselves, people notice our character. When we put others first, we discover a peace and contentment that all our self-promotion never brought us.
Suggestions
Here are two ways to practice humility and consideration:
Let others go first. Make this a daily practice. Let someone else have the better seat, the last piece of dessert, the choice of what to watch on TV. In conversations, ask about their day before talking about yours. At church, let someone else share their opinion first. When making family decisions, ask what others prefer before stating what you want. These small acts of consideration train your heart to think of others naturally.
Accept correction gracefully. When someone points out a mistake you made or suggests a better way to do something, resist the urge to get defensive or make excuses. Just say "thank you for telling me" or "you're right, I should have done that differently." When you're wrong, admit it quickly and completely. This kind of humility takes real strength, but it makes you someone people can trust and talk to honestly.
Into Action
This week, practice humility in one area where you usually insist on your way. Maybe you always control the thermostat at home—let someone else choose the temperature. Maybe you always pick the restaurant—ask others to choose. Maybe you dominate conversations—make a point to listen more and talk less. Maybe you're always right—practice saying "I might be wrong about this."
Also, look for one situation where you can defer to someone else even though you'd prefer something different. Do it cheerfully, without sighing or complaining or making sure everyone knows you're sacrificing. Just quietly put their preferences ahead of yours.
Pay attention to how you talk about yourself this week. Are you constantly bringing the conversation back to your accomplishments, your problems, your opinions? Practice being genuinely interested in others without making it about you.
A real person who lives this way: Consider Katherine Johnson, the NASA mathematician featured in the movie Hidden Figures. She calculated the flight paths that put Americans in space and on the moon—incredibly complex work that required genius-level math skills. But despite her brilliance, she was known for being humble and considerate. She didn't demand recognition or complain about the discrimination she faced as a Black woman in the 1960s. She just did excellent work and treated everyone with respect. When she finally received recognition late in life, including the Presidential Medal of Freedom, she remained humble. She said "I was just doing my job." She gave credit to her team and to God. She never acted like she was smarter than others, even though she clearly was. Katherine Johnson showed us that you can be brilliant and accomplished while still being humble. You can be strong without being arrogant. You can know your worth without needing everyone else to acknowledge it constantly. Real confidence doesn't need to boast. It just quietly does excellent work and treats everyone with dignity and consideration.
Prayer Focus
"Lord Jesus, You showed us perfect humility by leaving heaven to serve us on earth. Help us follow Your example by putting others first and considering their needs as important as our own. Guard our hearts from pride and give us the security that comes from knowing we are loved by You. Make us people who lift others up rather than putting them down. Amen."
Session
13: Avoid Gossip, Slander, and Judgment
Matthew
7:1, Leviticus 19:16, Proverbs 11:13, Ephesians 4:31
Study Notes — Handout — Audio
Key Idea: God wants us to build others up, not tear them down with our words.
Scripture:
"Do not judge others, and you will not be judged" (Matthew 7:1)
"Do not spread slanderous gossip among your people" (Leviticus 19:16)
"A gossip goes around telling secrets, but those who are trustworthy can keep a confidence" (Proverbs 11:13)
"Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior" (Ephesians 4:31)
What to Look For
As you read these verses, notice how God connects gossip and slander with other serious sins. Look for the contrast between trustworthy people and those who spread stories. Watch for how judgment of others brings judgment on ourselves.
Personal Reflection Questions
Think about a time when someone gossiped about you or judged you unfairly. How did it affect you, and what would you have wanted them to do instead?
If every word you spoke about others this week was printed in the church bulletin, would you be comfortable with what people would read?
Overview
At our age, we've all seen the damage that gossip, slander, and harsh judgment can do to families, friendships, and churches. We've witnessed relationships destroyed by careless words and reputations ruined by people who claimed to be concerned but were really just spreading rumors. We may have even participated in such talk ourselves and later regretted it. As mature believers, we have the opportunity to be different - to be the people others can trust with their struggles and failures without fear that we'll share their business with others.
This May Surprise You
Many people think avoiding gossip means we can never discuss problems or concerns about others. But there's a big difference between gossip and legitimate concern. Gossip is sharing information about someone when we're not part of the problem or the solution, and when our sharing won't help the person. Legitimate concern involves talking to the right people (like church leaders, family members, or counselors) when someone needs help or intervention. The test is simple: Are we sharing this information to help the person being discussed, or are we sharing it because it makes us feel important to know something others don't? Are we talking to someone who can actually help, or just to someone who will listen?
Seeds for Thought
"Do not judge others, and you will not be judged" (Matthew 7:1) Comment: This doesn't mean we never make wise decisions about people's character or behavior. It means we don't condemn others or act as their final judge. We can discern without being judgmental, and we can have opinions without being harsh or self-righteous.
"Do not spread slanderous gossip among your people" (Leviticus 19:16) Comment: Slander means saying things about someone that damage their reputation, whether those things are true or false. Even sharing true but harmful information can be wrong if it serves no good purpose. We're called to protect each other's reputations, not destroy them.
"A gossip goes around telling secrets, but those who are trustworthy can keep a confidence" (Proverbs 11:13) Comment: Being trustworthy with secrets makes us safe people for others to approach. When people know we won't share their private struggles, they're more likely to come to us for help, prayer, and guidance. Our discretion becomes a ministry tool.
"Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior" (Ephesians 4:31) Comment: Notice that harsh words and slander are listed alongside serious sins like rage and bitterness. God takes our speech seriously because He knows how much damage our words can do to others and to the unity of His people.
Take-Home Thought
God's plan for our words is that they would heal rather than harm, unite rather than divide, and build up rather than tear down. When we refuse to participate in gossip and harsh judgment, we create safe spaces where people can be honest about their struggles and find the help they need.
Our grandchildren are growing up in a world where people's mistakes and failures can be broadcast instantly and permanently through social media. They need to learn from us the value of discretion, loyalty, and giving others the benefit of the doubt. When they see us defend someone who's being criticized unfairly, when they watch us change the subject when gossip starts, when they observe us showing grace to people who've made mistakes, they learn what Christian love looks like in action. They discover that followers of Jesus protect each other's dignity rather than exposing each other's faults.
Quotes
Eleanor Roosevelt: "Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people."
Charles Spurgeon: "A lying tongue hates those it hurts, and a flattering mouth works ruin. How much mischief the unruly member can do!"
Similar Scripture
Proverbs 16:28 “A troublemaker plants seeds of strife; gossip separates the best of friends.”
James 1:26 “If you claim to be religious but don’t control your tongue, you are fooling yourself, and your religion is worthless.”
Proverbs 10:18 “Hiding hatred makes you a liar; slandering others makes you a fool.”
Psalm 15:2–3 “Those who lead blameless lives and do what is right, speaking the truth from sincere hearts. Those who refuse to gossip or harm their neighbors or speak evil of their friends.”
Proverbs 18:8 “Rumors are dainty morsels that sink deep into one’s heart.”
James 4:11 “Don’t speak evil against each other, dear brothers and sisters. If you criticize and judge each other, then you are criticizing and judging God’s law.”
Proverbs 12:18 “Some people make cutting remarks, but the words of the wise bring healing.”
Psalm 34:13 “Then keep your tongue from speaking evil and your lips from telling lies.”
Biblical Connection
James 3:5-6 - The tongue is a small part of the body that can cause great damage, like a spark starting a forest fire
Proverbs 18:8 - "Rumors are dainty morsels that sink deep into one's heart"
Matthew 12:36 - "I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak"
Romans 14:10 - "Why do you judge your brother or sister? Why do you treat them with contempt?"
1 Thessalonians 5:11 - "Therefore encourage one another and build each other up"
How Does This Help Me Trust God Today?
When people gossip about us or judge us harshly, we can trust that God knows the truth and will defend our reputation in His way and time. When we're tempted to share juicy information about someone else, we can trust that God is more pleased with our silence than He would be with our storytelling. We don't have to correct every wrong impression or defend ourselves against every criticism - God sees our hearts and will honor our restraint.
Legacy Lens
Our grandchildren will face peer pressure to join in when others are gossiping or being judgmental. They need to see from us that there's a better way to handle information about others - with discretion, loyalty, and grace.
Example: When family members start criticizing someone who's not present, gently redirect: "You know, we all have our struggles. Instead of talking about this, maybe we should pray for them." This shows your grandchildren how to stop gossip without being preachy or self-righteous.
Action Toolbox
Story to Share: Tell about a time when someone chose to keep your confidence or defend you when you weren't there to defend yourself. Describe how their loyalty made you feel and how it strengthened your relationship with them.
Activity: The "Golden Words Test" - Before sharing information about someone else, ask yourself three questions: 1) Is it true? 2) Is it necessary? 3) Is it kind? If the answer to any of these is "no," choose silence instead. This simple test can save relationships and reputations.
Changed Life
This teaching changes how we talk about people who aren't in the room. If we're honest, most of us have a gossip problem. We share information that isn't ours to share. We pass along rumors. We talk about people's failures and mistakes. We make judgments about their motives or character based on limited information. And we often do it without thinking we're doing anything wrong.
But God takes this seriously. He says gossip destroys relationships and communities. It breaks trust. It damages reputations. It reveals more about our character than about the person we're talking about. When we gossip or slander others, we're tearing down what God wants to build up.
When we commit to avoiding gossip and judgment, everything changes. We have to find something else to talk about besides other people's problems. We can't bond with others by criticizing someone together. We have to keep confidences even when a juicy story is begging to be told. We have to give people the benefit of the doubt instead of assuming the worst.
Here's what changes: people start to trust us. They know their secrets are safe with us. They know we won't talk about them behind their backs. Our relationships become healthier because they're not built on negativity. And we feel cleaner inside—we're not carrying around other people's business or poisoning our hearts with judgment.
Suggestions
Here are two ways to avoid gossip and judgment:
Use the "three questions" test. Before you share information about someone, ask yourself three questions: Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary? If the answer to any of these is no, don't say it. Even if something is true, if it's not kind or necessary to share, it's probably gossip. This simple test will stop most gossip before it starts.
Redirect gossip conversations. When someone starts gossiping to you, don't just listen and nod. Gently redirect. You might say "I don't think they'd want us talking about this" or "Have you talked to them directly about it?" or "I'd rather not discuss this." If they persist, change the subject. You can stop gossip without being preachy or self-righteous—just refuse to participate.
Into Action
This week, make a commitment to go seven days without gossiping, slandering, or harshly judging anyone. Not at home, not at church, not anywhere. When you're tempted to share a story about someone or criticize them, stop yourself.
Pay attention to how often you're tempted. Notice what situations make you want to gossip—is it with certain people? When you're bored? When you're feeling insecure? Understanding your patterns can help you break the habit.
If you catch yourself gossiping, stop mid-sentence if you have to. Apologize and say "I shouldn't be talking about this." If someone has been gossiping to you, consider going to them and saying "I've been thinking about our conversation, and I don't think we should have been discussing that person's situation."
Also, practice giving people the benefit of the doubt this week. When you hear something negative about someone, instead of assuming it's true and spreading it further, think of possible explanations that are more charitable. Maybe they're going through something you don't know about. Maybe the story is exaggerated. Choose to believe the best about people until you know otherwise.
A real person who lives this way: Consider how Abraham Lincoln handled his critics and enemies. As president during the Civil War, he faced constant criticism and personal attacks. His cabinet members criticized him behind his back. Newspapers slandered him daily. Political opponents questioned his character and abilities. But Lincoln refused to respond in kind. He didn't gossip about his critics or slander those who attacked him. When someone told him about harsh things said behind his back, he often responded with humor or grace rather than anger. He once said "I do the very best I know how—the very best I can; and I mean to keep on doing so until the end. If the end brings me out all right, what is said against me won't amount to anything." Lincoln showed us that secure people don't need to tear others down. He was so confident in his purpose that gossip and criticism didn't shake him or make him vengeful. He knew that responding to slander with more slander just spreads poison. Instead, he focused on doing what was right and let his character speak for itself. His example teaches us that the best response to gossip is to refuse to participate in it and to live with such integrity that gossip can't stick to us.
Prayer Focus
"Lord, help us guard our tongues and use our words to build others up rather than tear them down. Give us wisdom to know when to speak and when to stay silent. Help us be trustworthy with the secrets and struggles others share with us. Protect us from the temptation to gossip or judge harshly, and make us people who defend rather than attack. May our words reflect Your love and grace. Amen."
Session 14: Our Living Legacy - Why This Study Matters - Matthew 5:16
Opening Thought
You have lived decades of faith. You have weathered life's storms, celebrated God's goodness, and learned from both victories and mistakes. Now, in this season of life, you have something precious to offer: a living example of what it looks like to follow Jesus.
Scripture:
Scripture Foundation: "In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father" (Matthew 5:16).
Key Truth: We are living letters that others read every day.
Your grandchildren and the people around you are not just listening to what you say about Jesus—they are watching how you live. They see how you treat the cashier at the store, how you talk about your neighbors, how you respond when someone cuts you off in traffic. These moments teach more than any sermon.
What Are We Really Passing Down?
Think About This:
When your grandchildren remember you, what will they remember most?
What values are you passing down through your daily actions?
How do your words and behavior reflect your faith in Jesus?
Scripture Wisdom: "Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it" (Proverbs 22:6).
This verse isn't just about parents—it's about all of us who influence the next generation. Even as grandparents, aunts, uncles, or family friends, we are still shaping young hearts and minds.
In a World of Changing Values, We Can Be Steady
The Challenge We Face: Our world seems to change its values every day. What was right yesterday is wrong today. What was considered good is now called bad. In the middle of all this confusion, we who have walked with God for years can be like lighthouse beacons—steady, reliable, and pointing the way to safety.
Scripture Promise: "Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever" (Hebrews 13:8).
While the world shifts, God's truth remains the same. The way He calls us to treat others doesn't change with fashion or culture. Love, kindness, mercy, and grace are always right.
We're Not Just Finishing—We're Still Building
A New Perspective: You might think your main work is done. You've raised your family, built your career, served in your church. But here's the beautiful truth: you're not just finishing your race—you're still laying track for those who come after you.
Scripture Encouragement: "Even when I am old and gray, do not forsake me, my God, till I declare your power to the next generation, your mighty acts to all who are to come" (Psalm 71:18).
God isn't finished with you yet. He wants to use your years of experience to show His love to a world that desperately needs to see it.
What This Study Will Do
Over the next several weeks, we will explore what the Bible teaches about treating others with Christ-like love. But this isn't just about learning new facts. This is about:
Living It: Making these truths part of our daily lives
Modeling It: Showing others what Jesus looks like in action
Leaving It: Creating a legacy of love that lasts beyond our years
The Seeds We Plant Today
A Powerful Truth: What you model in love, humility, and kindness today becomes the seeds your grandchildren will plant tomorrow. When they face difficult people, they will remember how you handled difficult people. When they need to forgive, they will think of how you forgave. When they wonder how a Christian should act, they will picture you.
Discussion Questions:
What Christian example from your own past still influences you today?
How do you want to be remembered by your family?
What's one way you can be a better example of Christ's love this week?
Scripture Foundation
"In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father" (Matthew 5:16).
Key Truth: We are living letters that others read every day.
Your grandchildren and the people around you are not just listening to what you say about Jesus—they are watching how you live. They see how you treat the cashier at the store, how you talk about your neighbors, how you respond when someone cuts you off in traffic. These moments teach more than any sermon.
Changed Life
This teaching changes how we view this season of life. It's easy to feel like our most important years are behind us. We're not raising children anymore. We're not working. We may not get out as much as we used to. We might wonder if we still matter or if we have anything left to contribute.
But the truth is, these years might be the most important ones of all. Right now, we have the opportunity to show what a lifetime of following Jesus looks like. We can demonstrate that faith isn't just for the young and energetic. We can prove that God's love sustains us through aging, loss, and limitation. We can show that joy doesn't depend on health or circumstances.
When we realize we're living letters that others are reading, it changes how we approach each day. The way we handle disappointment teaches our grandchildren how to trust God. The way we treat people who are different from us shows what Jesus's love really looks like. The way we face our own mortality demonstrates whether our faith is real or just religious talk.
Our legacy isn't just what we leave behind when we die. It's what we live out right now, today, in front of the people who know us best.
Suggestions
Here are two ways to be intentional about your living legacy:
Live like someone's watching—because they are. Think about the people in your life who see you regularly. Your family, your neighbors, people at church, servers at restaurants you frequent. They're forming opinions about Jesus based on how you live. Before you speak or act, ask yourself "what am I teaching right now?" This doesn't mean being fake or performing. It means being mindful that your life is a witness, for good or for bad.
Tell your faith stories. Don't assume people know about the times God has been faithful to you. Share specific stories about how God has carried you through hard times, answered prayers, or changed you. When your grandchildren ask about your life, tell them about more than just the facts—tell them about God's presence in those moments. Write these stories down. Record them. Make sure the next generation knows that your faith is real because you've lived it.
Into Action
This week, have an honest conversation with God about your legacy. Ask Him to show you what kind of example you're setting right now. Are there areas where your life contradicts what you say you believe? Are there relationships where you need to live out your faith more clearly?
Then, choose one person who's watching your life—maybe a grandchild, a neighbor, a younger person at church—and be intentional about showing them what following Jesus looks like. Invite them into your life. Let them see how you pray, how you handle frustration, how you love difficult people, how you trust God with your fears.
Also, take time this week to write down or record one story of God's faithfulness in your life. Be specific. Include the details. Then share that story with someone who needs to hear it—maybe at a family gathering, maybe in a card to a grandchild, maybe in your small group.
A Final Thought
You've spent thirteen sessions studying how to love, serve, forgive, encourage, and live like Jesus. But here's what matters most: these aren't just good ideas to discuss. They're meant to be lived out in the ordinary moments of your everyday life.
You don't need to do anything dramatic or extraordinary. You just need to be faithful in the small things. Love the people in front of you. Speak truth with grace. Show mercy. Practice humility. Be generous with what you have. Let your life demonstrate that following Jesus is worth it, even after all these years.
The world is full of noise about what Christianity is supposed to be. But what people really need is to see it lived out authentically by someone who's walked with God for decades and can say "He's been faithful. He's been good. And I'm still following Him."
A Person Who Left This Kind of Legacy
Consider George Washington Carver, the scientist who revolutionized agriculture and helped poor farmers in the South. He was brilliant and could have become wealthy, but he chose to spend his life serving others. He taught farmers new ways to grow crops. He created hundreds of products from peanuts and sweet potatoes to help people make a living. He lived simply and gave away most of what he earned. But what people remembered most wasn't his inventions—it was his character. Students said he started each day in prayer, asking God to show him the secrets of nature. He treated everyone with respect, whether they were important or poor. He forgave those who discriminated against him because of his race. Near the end of his life, he said "It is not the style of clothes one wears, neither the kind of automobile one drives, nor the amount of money one has in the bank, that counts. These mean nothing. It is simply service that measures success." George Washington Carver showed that a legacy isn't about what you accumulate—it's about how you live and who you serve. And his example of faith, humility, and service is still teaching people today, long after he's gone. That's the kind of living legacy each of us can leave.
Our Prayer for This Study
"Lord Jesus, thank You for the privilege of representing You to our families and our world. Help us to see that our lives still matter greatly in Your kingdom. Give us wisdom to live in a way that points others to You. Help us to treat others with the same love, patience, and kindness that You show us every day. Use our words and actions to plant seeds of faith in the hearts of those who watch us. In Your precious name, Amen."
Biblical Teachings on How to Treat Others
A Study Guide for Living as Examples of Christ's Love
Introduction:
"In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father." (Matthew 5:16, NLT)
We Are the Living Legacy
We are the living legacy of faith—and our words and actions shape the next generation. After decades of walking with Christ, we've learned that faith isn't just something we profess on Sundays; it's something we live out daily in how we treat our spouse, our neighbor, the grocery store clerk, and yes, especially our grandchildren.
Our grandchildren are watching—not just what we say, but how we treat others. They notice when we're patient with a slow waiter or when we speak kindly about someone who has hurt us. They observe how we respond when someone cuts us off in traffic or when we disagree with a family member. These moments, perhaps more than our words, teach them what it truly means to follow Jesus.
What we model in love, humility, and kindness becomes the seeds our grandchildren will sow. The grace we show today will echo in their hearts tomorrow. The patience we demonstrate will become part of their character. The forgiveness we practice will shape how they handle their own relationships.
Our Calling as Mentors
The Bible gives us timeless wisdom—not just for our own walk, but for guiding those who follow. Scripture doesn't just tell us to love God; it shows us specifically how to love others. These aren't merely nice suggestions—they're the very characteristics that mark us as Christ's disciples.
In a world of shifting values, we can be steady compasses pointing to Christ. While culture changes rapidly around us, God's Word remains constant. Our grandchildren need to see what unchanging love looks like lived out in real life, in everyday moments, in ordinary interactions.
We're not just finishing our race—we're paving the way for theirs. The apostle Paul reminds us in 1 Corinthians 4:16 to "imitate me as I imitate Christ." As seasoned believers, we have the privilege and responsibility of being that example for the generation coming behind us.
The Heart of This Study
Let's explore how Scripture teaches us to treat others—so we can live it, teach it, and leave it behind as a gift. Over these thirteen sessions, we'll dive deep into God's Word to discover not just what Christ-like love looks like, but how to practice it in our daily lives.
This isn't about perfection—none of us have arrived. It's about growth, about becoming more like Jesus in how we interact with everyone around us. It's about leaving a legacy of love that our grandchildren will remember long after we're gone.
Each week, we'll examine biblical principles that can transform our relationships and our witness. We'll discuss practical ways to apply these truths, share our experiences, and encourage one another in this vital calling.
May God use this time together to deepen our love for Him and for others, and may our lives become living testimonies of His grace—examples that point our loved ones directly to the heart of our Savior.
"Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God." (1 John 4:7, NLT)
As Jeremiah 29:5–7 reminds us, even in seasons of uncertainty or change, we are called to build, plant, grow, and seek the peace of the place where God has placed us. For many of us in this Bible Study Class, life has brought transitions—some joyful, others painful. Physical limitations, the sad things we see in our society, illness, or the loss of loved ones may tempt us to turn inward. But Scripture urges us to remain outward-facing: to live lives of purpose, compassion, and connection.
Jesus echoes this in Matthew 5:16: “Let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father.” Our faith is not just a private belief—it’s a public witness; it's something we live out daily in how we treat our spouse, our neighbor, the grocery store clerk, and yes, especially our grandchildren. Our grandchildren are watching—not just what we say, but how we treat others. Turning our problems into opportunities; “Living where we land”, allows us to build, plant and grow in what ever condition we find ourselves.
This study is designed to help us refocus on what it means to treat others with kindness, dignity, and Christ-like love. In a world that often feels hurried and harsh, we are called to be gentle lights—living examples of God’s enduring goodness.
Session 1: Love Others Deeply and Sincerely - Mark 12:31, Matthew 5:44, 1 Peter 4:8, Romans 12:9
Session 3: Serve and Honor Others - John 13:14, Romans 12:10, Galatians 5:13, Philippians 2:3
Session 5: Be Just and Fair - Deuteronomy 16:19, Isaiah 1:17, Luke 6:31, Deuteronomy 24:17
Session 6: Forgive Freely and Graciously - Luke 6:37, Ephesians 4:32, Proverbs 17:9, Matthew 6:14
Session 7: Promote Peace and Unity - Matthew 5:9, Romans 12:18, 1 Peter 3:11, Ephesians 4:3
Session 11: Be Generous and Share - Luke 6:30, Romans 12:13, Hebrews 13:16, 2 Corinthians 9:7
Session 12: Be Humble and Considerate - Ephesians 5:21, Proverbs 3:7, Philippians 4:5, 1 Peter 5:5